¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside influence plays a key role in their de

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2024-06-21 1716

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I disagree with the statement that outside influence play a key role in a child's development. Here's why: Parents are typically the primary caregivers and educators in a child's life. They help children construct values, beliefs and behaviors while they are growing up. It is common belief that children who don't get proper care from their parents usually behave badly. They might struggle to make friends at school, so they tend to bother peers to get attention from their friends. Parents play a crucial role in shaping core values, morals and a sense of identity in their children. These elements form the basis upon which children understand themselves and interact with the world around them. Strong parental bonds and guidance can mitigate the impact of negative outside influences. If children have a strong bond with their parents, they are more likely to resist peer pressure, negative media messages and social norms. While outside influences contribute to a child's development, they imp

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Wishing you a fantastic start to the weekend Mr. Hwang!  I am particularly impressed with your discussion of the issue for raising children. You have generally added supporting arguments and necessary point of views. Good job!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I disagree with the statement that outside influence play a key role in a child's development. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
Here's why: Parents are typically the primary caregivers and educators in a child's life. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
They help children construct values, beliefs and behaviors while they are growing up.
>>> CORRECT!^^
 It is common belief that children who don't get proper care from their parents usually behave badly. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
They might struggle to make friends at school, so they tend to bother peers to get attention from their friends. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
Parents play a crucial role in shaping core values, morals and a sense of identity in their children. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
These elements form the basis upon which children understand themselves and interact with the world around them. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
Strong parental bonds and guidance can mitigate the impact of negative outside influences. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
If children have a strong bond with their parents, they are more likely to resist peer pressure, negative media messages and social norms.
>>> CORRECT!^^
 While outside influences contribute to a child's development...
>>> CORRECT!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133514 Old people\'s name with culture and values °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1
133513 What does a vacation make you feel? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1325
133512 Major holidays ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1543
133511 homework 12.28 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1553
133510 Would you rather visit every country or fly to outer space? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1814
133509 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it important... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 3
133508 What subject would you like to be most knowledgeable about? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1
133507 Would you like to be a celebrity? What do you think are the... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 0
133506 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1236
133505 homework ³ë*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1214
133504 What country would you like to visit? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1431
133503 homework ±è*´ã ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1625
133502 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1
133501 The most interesting person ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1743
133500 HOMEWORK FOR 12.27.2023 WRITING TASK: What is more important,... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1
133499 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 2160
133498 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 831
133497 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1
133496 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 1287
133495 Are video games better for you than watching TV? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-27 1399

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04