¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside influence plays a key role in their de

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2024-06-21 733

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I disagree with the statement that outside influence play a key role in a child's development. Here's why: Parents are typically the primary caregivers and educators in a child's life. They help children construct values, beliefs and behaviors while they are growing up. It is common belief that children who don't get proper care from their parents usually behave badly. They might struggle to make friends at school, so they tend to bother peers to get attention from their friends. Parents play a crucial role in shaping core values, morals and a sense of identity in their children. These elements form the basis upon which children understand themselves and interact with the world around them. Strong parental bonds and guidance can mitigate the impact of negative outside influences. If children have a strong bond with their parents, they are more likely to resist peer pressure, negative media messages and social norms. While outside influences contribute to a child's development, they imp

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Wishing you a fantastic start to the weekend Mr. Hwang!  I am particularly impressed with your discussion of the issue for raising children. You have generally added supporting arguments and necessary point of views. Good job!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I disagree with the statement that outside influence play a key role in a child's development. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
Here's why: Parents are typically the primary caregivers and educators in a child's life. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
They help children construct values, beliefs and behaviors while they are growing up.
>>> CORRECT!^^
 It is common belief that children who don't get proper care from their parents usually behave badly. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
They might struggle to make friends at school, so they tend to bother peers to get attention from their friends. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
Parents play a crucial role in shaping core values, morals and a sense of identity in their children. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
These elements form the basis upon which children understand themselves and interact with the world around them. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
Strong parental bonds and guidance can mitigate the impact of negative outside influences. 
>>> CORRECT!^^
If children have a strong bond with their parents, they are more likely to resist peer pressure, negative media messages and social norms.
>>> CORRECT!^^
 While outside influences contribute to a child's development...
>>> CORRECT!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132512 Do you want to spend your leisure time alone or with friends?... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 489
132511 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 902
132510 I live in Seongnam ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2
132509 My braveness and persistence ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 1026
132508 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 528
132507 Do you think veganism is just a current trend that will... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2
132506 16.Nov.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 0
132505 homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 4
132504 homework_231116 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 0
132503 homework_231115 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1
132502 What do you hope to have achieved by the time you\'re... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 810
132501 After learning that I did something wrong ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1209
132500 Home work ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 787
132499 Would you prefer language lessons one-to-one or do you like... Àü*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 5
132498 What do you think about technologies taking over people¡¯s... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 673
132497 please write your expectations from the class and from the... Àü*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2
132496 homework 11.16 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 900
132495 The book I¡¯m the most interested in ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 967
132494 Do you think people have fewer goals as they get older? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1077
132493 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 625

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04