¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think you could live without your smartphone (or other technology item) for 24 hours?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2024-06-18 1050

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Definitely, I can and hope to live without a smart phone. I know how detrimental to me it has been to me occasionally, esp. at night. Smart phone has kept me alert during the night which led to a bad performance during the day. It is true that smart phone can facilitate more effeciency or leisure in my life. However, there should be also some desolate parts in life caused by relentless and indiscreet use of smart phone. Smart phone is so fascinating that it is very hard to stand against the addiction to it. The best way to keep ourselves from the negativity is to keep a smartphone off our hands at home. That¡¯s because a smart phone is not usually needed at home as much as at work. In short, I confidently say yes to your question. That¡¯s what I live out all the time if possible.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Steve,

It's great to see how thoughtfully you've considered the role of smartphones in your life. You've highlighted some important points about their benefits and challenges. Keep exploring ways to balance technology use with personal well-being. Nice work on your homework!

~Teacher Cathy

 

Definitely, I can and hope to live without a smart phone.

>>Definitely, I can and hope to live without a smartphone.

I know how detrimental to me it has been to me occasionally, esp. at night.

>>CORRECT

OR>>I am aware of how harmful it has been to me sometimes, particularly during the night.

Smart phone has kept me alert during the night which led to a bad performance during the day.

>>Smartphones have kept me alert during the night which led to a bad performance during the day.

It is true that smart phone can facilitate more effeciency or leisure in my life.

>>It is true that smartphones can facilitate more efficiency or leisure in my life.

However, there should be also some desolate parts in life caused by relentless and indiscreet use of smart phone.

>>However, there should be also some desolate parts of life caused by the relentless and indiscreet use of smartphones.

Smart phone is so fascinating that it is very hard to stand against the addiction to it.

>>Smartphones are so fascinating that it is very hard to stand against the addiction to them.

The best way to keep ourselves from the negativity is to keep a smartphone off our hands at home.

>>The best way to keep ourselves from negativity is to keep a smartphone off our hands at home.

That¡¯s because a smart phone is not usually needed at home as much as at work.

>>That's because a smartphone is not usually needed at home as much as at work.

In short, I confidently say yes to your question.

>>CORRECT

OR>>In summary, I confidently say yes to your question.

That¡¯s what I live out all the time if possible.

>>CORRECT

OR>>I try to live by that principle whenever I can.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136641 HOMEWORK FOR 04.23.2024 WRITING TASK: What will you tell someone... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 3
136640 What are the popular places for vacation in your country? ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1385
136639 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1097
136638 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1140
136637 What\'s your favorite Korean holiday and why? ±æ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 8
136636 body languages ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 940
136635 Do dress codes reinforce gender stereotypes? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1728
136634 22.Apr.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1
136633 Do you like looking at the moon? ÀÌ*³ë ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1022
136632 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 980
136631 What cuisine will you never try? ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 845
136630 homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1436
136629 Can revenge be justified? ÃÖ* ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1568
136628 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-04-22 777
136627 Which animal would you be if you were an animal? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-22 2
136626 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-22 1045
136625 What is your weakness that hinders you from accomplishing your... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-22 1319
136624 I want to know whether the content of this paragraph is okay °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-22 4
136623 homework 04.22 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-04-22 1176
136622 If you could go back in time, what would you like to do after... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-22 1123

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04