¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 06.04

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-06-04 197

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the advantages and disadvantages of being nocturnal?

In my opinion, night owl people have more disadvantages than advantages.
Normal people work during the evening and afternoon and sleep at night.
But nocturnal people live the opposite way.
And these people overeating unhealthy food in the night.
This is why I think these life-style way it will have a bad effect on their health.
Unfortunate that in my country is there are many teenagers have nocturnal patterns.
This is because they have to go to school in the morning and go to the academy in the evening to study.
And, there are many students who sleep at school because they don't have enough sleep time.
That's why I think nocturnal life-style it's not good for our health.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the advantages and disadvantages of being nocturnal?


In my opinion, night owl people have more disadvantages than advantages.
>> In my opinion, being a night owl has more disadvantages than advantages.
Normal people work during the evening and afternoon and sleep at night.
>> CORRECT!
But nocturnal people live the opposite way.
>> CORRECT!
And these people overeating unhealthy food in the night.
>> And these people overeat unhealthy food at night.
This is why I think these life-style way it will have a bad effect on their health.
>> This is why I think this kind of lifestyle will have a bad effect on their health.
Unfortunate that in my country is there are many teenagers have nocturnal patterns.
>> It's unfortunate that in my country there are many teenagers who have nocturnal patterns.
This is because they have to go to school in the morning and go to the academy in the evening to study.
>> CORRECT!
And, there are many students who sleep at school because they don't have enough sleep time.
>> And, there are many students who sleep at school because they don't have enough sleep.
That's why I think nocturnal life-style it's not good for our health.
>> That's why I think having a nocturnal lifestyle is not good for our health.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138040 Do you think buffet restaurants are worth their price? Why or... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 242
138039 Have you ever helped a neighbor? What happened? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 274
138038 Do you wish you you were younger or older? Why? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 496
138037 Is there a difference between being thin and being healthy?... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 280
138036 Do you think people feel different when they wear different... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 292
138035 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 1
138034 Q) What kind of people do you like to be friends with on social... ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 298
138033 2024.06.24 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 2
138032 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 290
138031 Our trait is predetermined before being born? À±* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 272
138030 HOMEWORK FOR 06.19.2024 WRITING TASK: What do you consider when... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 4
138029 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 255
138028 How do you stay motivated to achieve your goals? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 318
138027 People who I get along with best ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 4
138026 Among the places you have visited, which was your least... ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 261
138025 HOMEWORK FOR 06.18.2024 WRITING TASK: What are good activities... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 2
138024 Is mental health more important than physical health? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 2
138023 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 1
138022 Try to be a man of value ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 247
138021 Why is it necessary to advertise? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 246

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04