¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 05.29

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-05-29 327

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Is population growth a concern in your country?

These days, the most hot issue is the population growth.
According to statistics, my country's last year birth rate was 0.7.
This means that only 70 children are born in 100 families.
And now this rate is lower.
These days, many young people have afraid of raising child.
If we want raising child, we must first have a home and need education.
So many people want to live in the capital or big cities for the good education.
But everything in those area is a burden for young couples to raising child.
The next reason is that society's perception changed.
Differently before, now many women graduate university and have good job.
But, many women don't have babies because they don't want to give up their careers in S.Korea.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Is population growth a concern in your country?


These days, the most hot issue is the population growth.
>> These days, the hottest issue is the population growth.
According to statistics, my country's last year birth rate was 0.7.
>> According to statistics, my country's birth rate last year was 0.7 percent.
This means that only 70 children are born in 100 families.
>> CORRECT!
And now this rate is lower.
>> CORRECT!
These days, many young people have afraid of raising child.
>> These days, many young people are afraid of raising a child.
If we want raising child, we must first have a home and need education.
>> If we want to raise a child, we must first have a home and money to provide their needs and for their education.
So many people want to live in the capital or big cities for the good education.
>> So many people want to live in the capital city or big cities for good education.
But everything in those areas is a burden for young couples to raising child.
>> But everything in those areas is a burden for young couples when raising child.
The next reason is that society's perception changed.
>> CORRECT!
Differently before, now many women graduate university and have good job.
>> Different from before, many women these days graduate from the university and have good jobs.
But, many women don't have babies because they don't want to give up their careers in S.Korea.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138098 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 256
138097 HOMEWORK FOR 06.25.2024 WRITING TASK: What do you do to save... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 2
138096 Do you like to go to the supermarket? How often do you go? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 216
138095 hw ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138094 What do I spend my money on? ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 4
138093 What is the importance of finding your passion? ¿À*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138092 How can you handle peer pressure while staying true to yourself... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 217
138091 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 306
138090 HOMEWORK FOR 06.21.2024 WRITING TASK: Do you believe in bad... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 4
138089 What kinds of crimes are increasing? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 842
138088 Is there a difference between ceremonial formal wear and... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 522
138087 Where in the world would you most like to go for your next... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 192
138086 The influence of influncers ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 302
138085 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 186
138084 Page 64 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138083 The best way to make the road transport of goods safer is to ask... ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 227
138082 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1
138081 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 253
138080 Do you think buffet restaurants are worth their price? Why or... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 235
138079 Household duties ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 285

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04