¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 05.27

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-05-27 280

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do you think skin care for men has only recently become popular?

In my country, many people think it's very important how I look to others.
In other words, it's being conscious of others.
Actually, I think this kinds of conscious made a lot of bad culture.
That's why there are a severe "Lookism" in Korea.
Anyway, recently, not only women, many men are doing skincare.
One of the reason is that they want to look handsome to they interested person.
Many people said that, when their skin is good condition can they become attractive.
Similarly, nowadays for other reasons why many men take care of their skin, the good skin has become a symbol of wealth.
As we know, the skincare cost in dermatologist is very expensive.
Typically, people who have where jobs they have to meet many people get a lot of skincare.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do you think skin care for men has only recently become popular?

In my country, many people think it's very important how I look to others.
>> CORRECT!
In other words, it's being conscious of others.
>> CORRECT!
Actually, I think this kinds of conscious made a lot of bad culture.
>> Actually, I think these kinds of consciousness made a lot of bad culture.
That's why there are a severe "Lookism" in Korea.
>> That's why there's a severe "Lookism" in Korea.
Anyway, recently, not only women, many men are doing skin care.
>> CORRECT!
One of the reason is that they want to look handsome to they interested person.
>> One of the reason is that they want to look handsome for the person they interested in. 
Many people said that, when their skin is good condition can they become attractive.
>> Many people said that, when their skin is in good condition, they can become attractive.
Similarly, nowadays for other reasons why many men take care of their skin, the good skin has become a symbol of wealth.
>> Similarly, nowadays, there are other reasons why many men take care of their skin, because a good skin has become a symbol of wealth.
As we know, the skin care cost in dermatologist is very expensive.
>> As we know, skin care costs an arm and a leg whenever you go to a dermatologist.
Typically, people who have where jobs they have to meet many people get a lot of skincare.
>> Typically, people who have jobs where they need to meet many people get a lot of skin care.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138098 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 384
138097 HOMEWORK FOR 06.25.2024 WRITING TASK: What do you do to save... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 2
138096 Do you like to go to the supermarket? How often do you go? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 339
138095 hw ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138094 What do I spend my money on? ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 4
138093 What is the importance of finding your passion? ¿À*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138092 How can you handle peer pressure while staying true to yourself... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 353
138091 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 438
138090 HOMEWORK FOR 06.21.2024 WRITING TASK: Do you believe in bad... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 4
138089 What kinds of crimes are increasing? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 978
138088 Is there a difference between ceremonial formal wear and... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 664
138087 Where in the world would you most like to go for your next... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 321
138086 The influence of influncers ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 431
138085 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 313
138084 Page 64 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138083 The best way to make the road transport of goods safer is to ask... ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 358
138082 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1
138081 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 387
138080 Do you think buffet restaurants are worth their price? Why or... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 368
138079 Household duties ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 413

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04