¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Is anger ever a good thing? If so, when? Why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Áö
2024-05-27 261

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don¡¯t think that an anger is always bad.
Sometimes the anger can create the better situation instead of creating conflict.
And this depends on how he (or she) expresses his (or her) anger.
If his anger is about his only expression of emotion, it is hard to improve things for the better.
However his anger contains the point of argument, it can rather quickly improve the situation.
I sometimes experience this kind of situation.
When we encounter a problem that can¡¯t be easily solved in a meeting, someone expresses his worries with anger.
After that people start to focus on the issues to suggest solutions and sometimes a good solutions comes out.
I don¡¯t prefer to this approach but I agree that this effective in some cases.
Above all, being angry helps your mental health if this is not often, it is better to be angry than to endure it.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Claire! 
Thanks for the effort and time you spent writing this composition. Your ideas were organized well and the flow is good. Please take note of minor punctuation and article corrections. Anyway, keep up the good work and see you tomorrow! 
~~Teacher Kate 
I don¡¯t think that an anger is always bad.
>>CORRECT!
Sometimes the anger can create the better situation instead of creating conflict.
>>Sometimes the anger can create a better situation instead of creating conflict.
And this depends on how he (or she) expresses his (or her) anger.
>>CORRECT!
If his anger is about his only expression of emotion, it is hard to improve things for the better.
>>CORRECT!
However his anger contains the point of argument, it can rather quickly improve the situation.
>>However, if his anger contains the point of the argument, it can rather quickly improve the situation.
I sometimes experience this kind of situation.
>>CORRECT!
When we encounter a problem that can¡¯t be easily solved in a meeting, someone expresses his worries with anger.
>>CORRECT!
After that people start to focus on the issues to suggest solutions and sometimes a good solutions comes out.
>>After that, people start to focus on the issues to suggest solutions and sometimes a good solution comes out.
>>OR: After that, people start to focus on the issues to suggest solutions and sometimes they come up with a good solution.
I don¡¯t prefer to this approach but I agree that this effective in some cases.
>>I don¡¯t prefer this approach but I agree that this is effective in some cases.
Above all, being angry helps your mental health if this is not often, it is better to be angry than to endure it.
>>Above all, being angry helps your mental health if this is not often. It is better to be angry than to endure it.
>>OR: Above all, being angry sometimes helps with your mental health. It is better to be angry than to endure it.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138263 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-04 433
138262 How do you understand ¡°Don¡¯t judge a book by its cover¡±? Are... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-07-04 402
138261 Why the people want to move after retirement? Á¤*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-04 376
138260 What are the pros and cons of being in a nursing home? Do the... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-04 7
138259 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 1
138258 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 4
138257 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 470
138256 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 441
138255 2024.07.02 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 391
138254 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 2
138253 How much walking do you do every day? What useful things could... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 413
138252 July 1st\'s homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 420
138251 Television or books È«*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 7
138250 What kinds of street food are popular in Korea? What kinds of... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 386
138249 Why do some people lack clarity about their true life goals? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 450
138248 Illness ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 539
138247 make it ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 2
138246 What is the most difficult part of studying English? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 1
138245 How do you feel when you think you are not prepared for something ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 1
138244 What is the most challenging part of your job? ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 443

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04