¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 05.21

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-05-21 851

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the reasons why people hoard?

I think the reason why some people are hoarding is to make money easily.
I think why the hoarding happen is simple.
This is because of supply and demand.
So hoarding is one of the social problems that since a long time.
People who are hoarding can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
But these days, many people are more angry compare to a few years ago about hoarding.
This is because they sell a ridiculous price.
Examples, there are idol concert tickets, limited goods, and more.
They even use the macro applications.
And we can't win the computer applications with human hands.
So many companies try to prevent this kinds of bad people.
However, it's not easy to stop their acting.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the reasons why people hoard?


I think the reason why some people are hoarding is to make money easily.
>> CORRECT!
I think why hoarding happen is simple.
>> I think the reason why the hoarding happens is simple.
This is because of supply and demand.
>> CORRECT!
So hoarding is one of the social problems that since a long time.
>> So hoarding is one of the social problems ever since.
People who are hoarding can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Hoarders can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
But these days, many people are more angry compare to a few years ago about hoarding.
>> But these days, many people are angrier compared to a few years ago about hoarding.
This is because they sell a ridiculous price.
>> This is because they sell items in a ridiculous price.
Examples, there are idol concert tickets, limited goods, and more.
>> CORRECT!
They even use the macro applications.
>> CORRECT!
And we can't win the computer applications with human hands.
>> CORRECT!
So many companies try to prevent this kinds of bad people.
>> So many companies try to prevent these kinds of bad people.
However, it's not easy to stop their acting.
>> However, it's not easy to stop the way they act.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130341 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2044
130340 What are you like when you are angry? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2
130339 What are the advantages of living in an apartment? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1351
130338 How do you feel about fusion food? Do you prefer traditional... ¼Û*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1512
130337 What mechanisms are necessary for people to go through in order... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 899
130336 To develop my life ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1548
130335 What are the benefits of waking up early? È«*±â ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1229
130334 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2730
130333 How does showing care towards others contribute to building... Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1580
130332 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1039
130331 Do you think the technology that we have right now is effective... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1922
130330 Homework ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1279
130329 Have you ever committed a small/ petty crime when you were young? ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1277
130328 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1238
130327 8/21 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 15
130326 Weekend activities ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1100
130325 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1026
130324 ESSAY ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 3
130323 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-20 2238
130322 What kind of person do you want to avoid? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-08-20 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04