¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 05.21

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-05-21 407

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the reasons why people hoard?

I think the reason why some people are hoarding is to make money easily.
I think why the hoarding happen is simple.
This is because of supply and demand.
So hoarding is one of the social problems that since a long time.
People who are hoarding can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
But these days, many people are more angry compare to a few years ago about hoarding.
This is because they sell a ridiculous price.
Examples, there are idol concert tickets, limited goods, and more.
They even use the macro applications.
And we can't win the computer applications with human hands.
So many companies try to prevent this kinds of bad people.
However, it's not easy to stop their acting.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the reasons why people hoard?


I think the reason why some people are hoarding is to make money easily.
>> CORRECT!
I think why hoarding happen is simple.
>> I think the reason why the hoarding happens is simple.
This is because of supply and demand.
>> CORRECT!
So hoarding is one of the social problems that since a long time.
>> So hoarding is one of the social problems ever since.
People who are hoarding can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Hoarders can easily make a lot of money through hoarding.
But these days, many people are more angry compare to a few years ago about hoarding.
>> But these days, many people are angrier compared to a few years ago about hoarding.
This is because they sell a ridiculous price.
>> This is because they sell items in a ridiculous price.
Examples, there are idol concert tickets, limited goods, and more.
>> CORRECT!
They even use the macro applications.
>> CORRECT!
And we can't win the computer applications with human hands.
>> CORRECT!
So many companies try to prevent this kinds of bad people.
>> So many companies try to prevent these kinds of bad people.
However, it's not easy to stop their acting.
>> However, it's not easy to stop the way they act.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136504 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 0
136503 How do you make plans? Tell me more about it ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 127
136502 What insect are you afraid the most? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 0
136501 What makes you happy and why? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 0
136500 What can you say about bullying? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 238
136499 2024.04.17 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 1
136498 Honesty ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 133
136497 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 219
136496 Dance ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 182
136495 What kind of tourist attractions do you usually like to visit;... ¿À*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 2
136494 Homework Á¶*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 288
136493 holiday ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 290
136492 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 1
136491 What do you like most about living in Korea? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 203
136490 Did you fo through training in your workplace? How was it like? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 4
136489 Would you like to have a set of jewelry with your birthstone in... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 162
136488 2024.04.16 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 243
136487 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 3
136486 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 158
136485 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-17 347

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04