¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you love yourself? Is it important to love yourself?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼ø
2024-05-15 1647

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Of course, I love myself.
Self-esteem is important for living.
It"s influenced by parents in childhood and by people in a social environment.
It has a positive power .
So, it helps to achieve a goal and to get through difficulties.
It makes people encouraging.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Young Soon!
You would be able to see the differences in the way you write each time.
Learn from your mistakes and become better in expressing yourself.
Let's keep this going.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
Of course, I love myself.
>> Correct
Self-esteem is important for living.
>> Correct
It"s influenced by parents in childhood and by people in a social environment.
>> It's influenced by parents during childhood and by other people in a social environment.
It has a positive power .
>> It has a positive impact. 
So, it helps to achieve a goal and to get through difficulties.
>> Correct
It makes people encouraging.
>> It makes people feel motivated. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137095 Do you love yourself? Is it important to love yourself? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 1154
137094 Among those countries you\'ve visited, what custom or tradition... ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 0
137093 Describe yourself as a learner ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 2
137092 2024.05.10 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 0
137091 Aside from your work, what are the things that will make you... ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 925
137090 my thought about historical movies ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 988
137089 2024.05.09 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 936
137088 When someone invites you to a birthday, do you go there one time? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 1221
137087 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 1177
137086 May 8th\'s homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 851
137085 Some pieces of art sell for millions of dollars. Why are some... À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 1
137084 Do you think that being a cabin crew is easier than being a chef? õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 2
137083 What are the latest trends in your country? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 4
137082 What situation will interrupt you from focusing on things? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 5
137081 Do you think the ambience is important in restaurants? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 759
137080 After the betrayal ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 859
137079 Describe a photograph you like ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 0
137078 What¡¯s the most challenging thing about having a pet? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 0
137077 Are you body conscious or health conscious? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-10 1153
137076 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-09 936

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04