¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think is the most popular toy for children nowadays?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Â÷*Áø
2024-05-12 917

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the most popular toy is Nintendo or idol card and board games
Some boys like Nintendo game pack, some girls like idol card.
And board games are popular with all children.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening there, Yale!

Here's your revised composition. As always, please go through the corrections and alternative expressions, such as "I would say...". Anyway, see you again on Wednesday!  


Cheers,
Jean~~



    
                          What do you think is the most popular toy for children nowadays?



I think the most popular toy is Nintendo or idol card and board games
>> OR: I would say that Nintendo or idol cards, and board games are the most popular toys these days. 

Some boys like Nintendo game pack, some girls like idol card.
>> Some boys like Nintendo game packs while some girls prefer idol cards.

And board games are popular with all children.
>> CORRECT~~

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140256 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 0
140255 Homework ¾È*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 483
140254 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 1
140253 How should parents avoid losing a child in a public place? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 439
140252 Do you always ask for help when you need it? Explain your answer. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 327
140251 How do you protect your personal information online? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 1
140250 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 348
140249 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 432
140248 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 1
140247 What would a perfect weekend be like for you? IS you could have... Â÷*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 2
140246 Do you enjoy meeting new people? Why or why not? Â÷*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 2
140245 homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 535
140244 What was the most memorable weekend you had with your friends? ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-06 462
140243 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-05 2
140242 Imagine you have won ten million dollars. Who will you tell?... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-05 353
140241 What qualities of a person do most people admire? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-05 2
140240 How would the world look if everyone had the same talents? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 409
140239 Proper Compulsiveness makes it better ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 236
140238 English grammar is difficult to me! ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 1
140237 Being physically attractive ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 436

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04