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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Today\'s homework

작성자: 이*도
2024-05-09 109

회원님의 영작문

HOMEWORK:
Which is better, having new things or keeping old things?

I think that new thing is better than old thing. But, we must search which is the good thing in this situation.
If the situation requires old things, We choose old one. For example, korean heating system, korean traditional house, and other useful skills.
However, the situation requires new one, We must change method. We can't use old printing system, nevertheless there is better printing system.
In the book which i read, somebody says that "People society are flood. that is unexpected, riding skill become old thing soon. If not you make new riding skills, you are eaten the flood. And these are made for the old.
The world change very fast. We must remind yesterday, accept good thing, and upgrade life quality.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Mr. Lee!
Sometimes, keeping old things reminds us how far have been through. However, it should push us to achieve more new things in life. Thank you for citing different examples.
Have a great weekend experience!
T. Aki~



I think that new thing is better than old thing. But, we must search which is the good thing in this situation.
>>> I think that new things are better than old things. But, we must search for which is the good thing in this situation.

If the situation requires old things, We choose old one. For example, korean heating system, korean traditional house, and other useful skills.
>>> If the situation requires old things, We choose the old ones. For example, Korean heating systems, korean traditional houses, and other useful skills.

However, the situation requires new one, We must change method. We can't use old printing system, nevertheless there is better printing system.
>>> However, the situation requires a new one, We must change the method. We can't use the old printing system, nevertheless, there is a better printing system.

In the book which i read, somebody says that "People society are flood. that is unexpected, riding skill become old thing soon. 
>>>  In the book which I read, somebody says that "People society are flooded. that is unexpected, riding skills become an old thing soon. 

If not you make new riding skills, you are eaten the flood. And these are made for the old.
>>> If not you make new riding skills, and you are eaten by the flood. And these are made for the old.

The world change very fast. We must remind yesterday, accept good thing, and upgrade life quality.
>>> The world changes very fast. We must be reminded of yesterday, accept the good things, and upgrade our quality of life. 
>>> The world changes very fast. We must remember yesterday, accept the good things, and upgrade our quality of life.
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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03
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04

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