¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Û*ÈÆ
2024-05-02 278

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®



Thank you Gemma!
See you soon!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good afternoon Diego~!^^ Thanks for having an impressive understanding and depth of knowledge about your interests in writing topics. 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Scientists have been warning for many years already that in order to protect the environment people should use less energy. 
However, most people do not change their ways of living. What is causing this behavior? How can people be encouraged to change?

There's a great apologue which is called 'Boiling frog.' 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
The frog won't jump out from the pot because it boils slowly. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
However frog will jump out when suddenly pot becomes hot.
>>> However, [the] frog [tried jumping] out when suddenly [the] pot becomes hot. 
This story tells us, people don't aware the changing  environment when it goes slowly. 
>>> This story tells us that people aren't aware of the changing  environment when it goes slowly. 
They need sudden impact or else they will stay dull. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Some people might still, there is hope, but I don't think people can change themselves.
>>> Some people might think that there is still hope, but I don't think people can change themselves.
 We are already paying the debt for what we have done for centuries. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Around the world, so many disasters coming up.
>>> Around the world, so many disasters [occur].
Floods, abnormal temperature, typhoon, hurricanes and etc, but still, we recognize as simple events, unconnected phenomena.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
The main course of the environment pollution is China and America.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
They are powerful nations, other countries spend their products.
>>> They are powerful nations that other countries [consume] their products.
Their products inevitably accompany environment pollutions.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
So we cannot just blame them however, we have to make them concerned about the environment. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Both countries are not even joining in 'Paris Climate Agreement'.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 It is time to unite and make one voice to both countries. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 This problem cannot be solved by individuals.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 It should be treated by the government and companies.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 The forceful measure is the effective way to change our behavior.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136763 Do you love peace and quiet? Where do you go to feel that way? ±è* ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 0
136762 What do you think of ? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 201
136761 How do you think the popularity of e-bikes will evolve in the... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 170
136760 Can you describe your typical Wednesday? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 204
136759 How do personal goals and career ambitions influence the choice... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 214
136758 2024.04.26 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 1
136757 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 152
136756 Is the desert safe or dagerous to visit? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 477
136755 peace and quiet ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 3
136754 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 2
136753 Do you think Korean cuisine is healthier compare to other... ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 251
136752 Many families send their children to private institutes or... À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 1
136751 What would you do if there\'s an urgent situation at work and no... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 2
136750 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 298
136749 Playing a claw machine game is the best way to relieve stress. ÃÖ* ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 221
136748 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 150
136747 My weakness that hinders mi from accomplishing my goals. ÃÖ* ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 263
136746 What preparation in general do you need to have before... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 238
136745 24.Apr.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 0
136744 What part of the concert will bring you disappointed? ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 236

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04