¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HW

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ª*Áø
2024-04-30 1623

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Two factors continually drive me to hustle within the industry: passion for gaming and results. Firstly, being a gamer at heart, I inherently enjoy playing games, which makes working in the gaming industry fulfilling. This passion sustains me through challenging times. For instance, my consistent involvement in content production activities ensures my perseverance. Secondly, the results of my hard work serve as motivation. Successes like securing significant contracts or improving processes in my current role fuel my desire to achieve further. As someone who constantly seeks growth, I channel this passion into areas I care about deeply.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Eugene! 
You used effective expressions and organization to showcase your ideas in this response while maintaining a professional tone.
Great job!
~ Teacher Maxine

Two factors continually drive me to hustle within the industry: passion for gaming and results. 
>> CORRECT

Firstly, being a gamer at heart, I inherently enjoy playing games, which makes working in the gaming industry fulfilling. 
>> CORRECT

This passion sustains me through challenging times. 
>> CORRECT

For instance, my consistent involvement in content production activities ensures my perseverance. 
>> CORRECT
OR >> For example, my unwavering commitment to content production activities reflects this dedication.

Secondly, the results of my hard work serve as motivation. 
>> CORRECT
OR >> Secondly, the tangible outcomes of my hard work serve as a powerful source of motivation.

Successes like securing significant contracts or improving processes in my current role fuel my desire to achieve further. 
>> CORRECT

As someone who constantly seeks growth, I channel this passion into areas I care about deeply.
>> CORRECT
OR >> As someone who is constantly seeking personal and professional growth, I channel this passion into meaningful contributions within the areas I deeply care about.



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136295 How are hobbies now different from hobbies in the past? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 0
136294 Do you enjoy going to different places just to eat? ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1563
136293 keeping pets for children Á¤*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1935
136292 What was your worst experience of rejection and best experience... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1
136291 homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 2041
136290 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1718
136289 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2085
136288 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1485
136287 I want to know these sentences are grammatically correct! °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1587
136286 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2
136285 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1834
136284 What is the most common way of inviting someone formally in your... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 2392
136283 About my best friend ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1504
136282 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1661
136281 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1980
136280 Describe your dream wardrobe ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 0
136279 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1
136278 Aside from mermaids, what other mythical creatures do you know? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1460
136277 Is Father¡¯s Day celebrated in your country? Why is such a day... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1383
136276 2024.04.09 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-04-10 1530

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04