¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework 4

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Û*ÈÆ
2024-04-30 468

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®



Thank you Gemma!
Your wise advice always inspires me.
I wish you have great day!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day Diego! ^^ Something special awaits you each day. All you need is to recognize it and make the most of it. Have a positive attitude throughout the day and then that today is going to be the best day of your life! See you! ^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
 Some people believe the purpose of education is to prepare individuals to be beneficial to society.  Others say the purpose of education is to achieve personal ambitions. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

I believe both point of views about education are all correct and acceptable.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
We can expect contribution in society and personal success.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Education can generate holistic human who can develop society in various area.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Their talents can be found through education. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
By developing one's skills and ability, whole society earns benefits.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Education occurs desirable competition that can provide fair opportunity.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
However, we must not forget, education is not be only used as tools to maintain society.
>>> However, we must not forget, education shouldn't only be used as a tool to maintain society.
 If there is no consideration about personal desire, that can lead society to totalitarianism.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
The negative effects of totalitarianism never accepts minorities' opinions which can provide chance to solve problems in society such as human rights, environment issues and expressions of liberties.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
There is no reason to suppress one's desire to success.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 Education should support one's career and dreams.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Once the individual values harmonized with society's importance, both individual and society can flourish and help each other. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Society should encourage desirable competition and equal opportunities to achieve one's goals. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Education is excellent method to contribute to both society and individuals.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135206 Question about \\\'Compared to\\\' Á¤*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 585
135205 Page.11 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 3
135204 Was I rude in the subway? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 335
135203 homework 03.04 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 513
135202 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 295
135201 2023.03Á¦.4 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2
135200 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1
135199 Homework ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1
135198 Are you afraid of a snake? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 156
135197 What do you like about traveling ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 211
135196 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 219
135195 Compare living with roommates with living alone. Which living... ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 405
135194 What other training do you have about airlines? õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 228
135193 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Do you want... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 0
135192 letter ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 424
135191 What fun things do you enjoy doing when you\'re on vacation?... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1
135190 The best ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 16
135189 What do you find most challenging about graduate studies? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 265
135188 homework ÇÑ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1
135187 Price is the only consideration when buying something ÀÓ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 585

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04