무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What are the pros and cons of rock climbing to keep fit and healthy?

작성자: 박*호
2024-04-30 574

회원님의 영작문

It seems that the number of people who climb rocks to maintain their body or stay healthy is increasing.
Recently, not only outdoor rock climbing but also indoor rock climbing seems to be becoming a sport.
I have never personally tried rock climbing, so I will talk about the pros and cons based on what I have read about it.
First, let me talk about the pros.
First, it is an exercise that is not boring.
Rock climbing can be enjoyed just like a game.
Second, it is a full body exercise.
It is a balanced exercise that uses the muscles of the entire body, including the arms, legs, back, and abdomen.
Third, it is good for mental health.
Rock climbing relieves stress and gives you a sense of accomplishment.
Next, I will talk about the cons.
First, there is a high risk of injury.
When rock climbing, you may fall from a high place.
Second, you must give up beauty of hands.
When you climb, you often get cuts or scars on your hands.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hey there, Sun! 

Climbing is a full-body exercise: You'll use your upper body, core, and lower body, and will especially work your pulling muscles, including your biceps, wrist flexors, and back muscles. You'll even use those in your fingers and feet.

- Kristine ^^ 

It seems that the number of people who climb rocks to maintain their body or stay healthy is increasing.
>> It seems that the number of people who climb rocks to maintain their bodies or stay healthy is increasing.
Recently, not only outdoor rock climbing but also indoor rock climbing seems to be becoming a sport.
>> It appears that indoor and outdoor rock climbing are growing in popularity as sports recently.
I have never personally tried rock climbing, so I will talk about the pros and cons based on what I have read about it.
>> Since I haven't experienced rock climbing myself, I will discuss its pros and cons based on what I have read.
First, let me talk about the pros.
>> Correct. 
First, it is an exercise that is not boring.
>> It is an exercise that is entertaining, to start.
Rock climbing can be enjoyed just like a game.
>> You can enjoy rock climbing in the same way as playing a game.
Second, it is a full body exercise.
>> Second, it is a full-body exercise.
It is a balanced exercise that uses the muscles of the entire body, including the arms, legs, back, and abdomen.
>> Correct. 
Third, it is good for mental health.
>> Correct. 
Rock climbing relieves stress and gives you a sense of accomplishment.
>> Correct. 
Next, I will talk about the cons.
>> Correct. 
First, there is a high risk of injury.
>> To begin with, the risk of injury is significant.
When rock climbing, you may fall from a high place.
>> You run the risk of falling from a height when rock climbing.
Second, you must give up beauty of hands.
>> Secondly, you have to forfeit your hand's beauty.
When you climb, you often get cuts or scars on your hands.
>> Correct. 
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
132496 homework 11.16 최*� 완료 2023-11-16 1003
132495 The book I’m the most interested in 송*우 완료 2023-11-16 1025
132494 Do you think people have fewer goals as they get older? 김*경 완료 2023-11-16 1138
132493 Homework 김*우 완료 2023-11-16 716
132492 What kind of community do you have in Ulsan? Write about it. 오*혁 완료 2023-11-16 2
132491 Homework 이*화 완료 2023-11-16 1248
132490 Homework 김*서 완료 2023-11-16 2
132489 Cooking 이*솔 완료 2023-11-16 1203
132488 Do you think that one day there will be just one language in the... 에*미 완료 2023-11-16 2
132487 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Would you like... 앨* 완료 2023-11-16 3
132486 Homework 김* 완료 2023-11-16 0
132485 How do you clean your body? 최*한 완료 2023-11-16 763
132484 The advantages of sharing my worries with my family 강*율 완료 2023-11-16 1
132483 Homework 류*우 완료 2023-11-16 1422
132482 Does music have the power to change your mood? 이*성 완료 2023-11-16 4
132481 Letter 박*준 완료 2023-11-16 1
132480 Survey 권*정 완료 2023-11-16 1
132479 How do you think social media platforms contribute to the... 김*진 완료 2023-11-16 1
132478 pention 권*희 완료 2023-11-16 1113
132477 homework 안*숙 완료 2023-11-16 797

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]