¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 04.25

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-04-25 183

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you believe that it is important for all countries to have military forces? Why?

I think each country should have military forces.
This is because, basically the role of military is to protect the country and citizens.
But some countries they don't have military forces or they can't make a formal military forces.
The most reason are political problem or geopolitical issues.
For example, there are several countries like Palau, Liechtenstein, and Palestine.
They don't have formal army, instead police the play role of the army or near the other countries help the national defense.
Among the countries don't have military, Japan is unique country.
Japan can't make normal military forces after losing "the second world war".
But, they are made Self-Defense Forces.
This is not called the Army, but it's serves as the army.
To sum up, most countries have military forces for protect to their countries.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you believe that it is important for all countries to have military forces? Why?


I think each country should have military forces.
>> CORRECT!
This is because, basically the role of military is to protect the country and citizens.
>> CORRECT!
But some countries they don't have military forces or they can't make a formal military forces.
>> But for some countries, they don't have military forces or they can't make formal military forces.
The most reason are political problem or geopolitical issues.
>> The biggest reasons are political problems and geopolitical issues.
For example, there are several countries like Palau, Liechtenstein, and Palestine.
>> CORRECT!
They don't have formal army, instead police the play role of the army or near the other countries help the national defense.
>> They don't have a formal army, and instead, police officers play the role of the army or other neighboring countries help in the national defense.
Among the countries don't have military, Japan is unique country.
>> Among the countries that don't have a military, Japan is a unique country.
Japan can't make normal military forces after losing "the second world war".
>> CORRECT!
But, they are made Self-Defense Forces.
>> But, they are made for the Self-Defense Forces.
This is not called the Army, but it's serves as the army.
>> This is not called the Army, but it serves as the army.
To sum up, most countries have military forces for protect to their countries.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136944 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 0
136943 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 0
136942 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 1
136941 Which products would you like to sell if you had your own store? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 291
136940 my favorite animal ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 273
136939 Have you ever experienced stiffness? If yes, how did you handle... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 310
136938 Gossip ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 2
136937 Could you tell me about your family? Write at least three things... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 326
136936 Who do you think is the worst superhero? Why? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 231
136935 Describe a good memory you had when you were young. ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-04 257
136934 homework 05.03 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 306
136933 Complete each sentence using the correct correlative conjunction... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 2
136932 Is dancing a good hobby? Why? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 191
136931 The best magic performer ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 484
136930 >> What are your thoughts on Korean dramas or movies? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 1
136929 2024.05.02 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 254
136928 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 3
136927 2024.05.03 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 1
136926 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 290
136925 Who do you think is the most beautiful person in your counntry? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-03 280

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04