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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

The life of government official is diffrent from what I expected!

작성자: 김*민
2024-04-25 670

회원님의 영작문

When I was in university, I was super shy girl. So I usually got nervous when I met people even though I majored in Social Welfare.
During in university, I always thought that I'm not cut out for working in social welfare area.
After graduated, I thought that I would rarely met people being the government official.
I had an image of official, working only in office and rarely communicating with people.
So I started to study to be an official, and then I passed the exam and finally became a local government official.

But my fantasy of official was shattered.
While working, I have communicated -sometimes I fought- with people more than when I was in university.
I even visited the home who need to help, talked with them, and gave items that are donated.
While Covid-19 pandamic, I even delivered groceries to the confirmed case!

Therefore, the life of official what I have expected is very far from its reality.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you for writing a meaningful essay, Min. I believe that you have learned a lot from your work and it made you a better person. ^^
-Khai

When I was in university, I was super shy girl. 

>> When I was in university, I was a super shy girl. 

So I usually got nervous when I met people even though I majored in Social Welfare.

>> CORRECT

During in university, I always thought that I'm not cut out for working in social welfare area.

>> During my university years, I always thought that I was not fit to work in social welfare.

After graduated, I thought that I would rarely met people being the government official.

>> After graduating, I thought I would rarely meet people being a government official.

I had an image of official, working only in office and rarely communicating with people.

>> I had an image of an official who is only working in the office and rarely communicates with people.

So I started to study to be an official, and then I passed the exam and finally became a local government official.

>> CORRECT

But my fantasy of official was shattered.

>> CORRECT

OR

>> But my dream of becoming an official was shattered.

While working, I have communicated -sometimes I fought- with people more than when I was in university.

>> While working, I have communicated and sometimes even fought with people more compared with when I was in the university.

I even visited the home who need to help, talked with them, and gave items that are donated.

>> I even visited a home that needed help, talked with them, and gave donated items.

While Covid-19 pandamic, I even delivered groceries to the confirmed case!

>> During the COVID-19 pandemic, I even delivered groceries to the confirmed case!

Therefore, the life of official what I have expected is very far from its reality.

>> Therefore, the life of an official I have expected is very far from its reality.


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지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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