¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*´Ô
2024-04-24 1198

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don¡¯t think there is a junk food tax for disease.
We need to distinguish who need to help.
Our country have a medical system for people who have serious disease and poor patients.
And government is already imposing the tax to every consumption.
The more people who consume a lot They are taxing a lot.
It is more natural I think.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Great day, Ms. Sunny!
I grasp your point that the government has been implementing various tax measures, which also serve as a means to dissuade individuals from consuming unhealthy products like soda, cigarettes, and alcohol. 
Then perhaps we should entrust the decision to the consumer. After all, it will always lead to personal choice.
Good day!
Aki~

I don¡¯t think there is a junk food tax for disease.
>>> CORRECT!

We need to distinguish who need to help.
>>> We need to distinguish who needs help.

Our country have a medical system for people who have serious disease and poor patients.
>>> Our country has a medical system for people who have serious disease and poor patients.

And government is already imposing the tax to every consumption.
>>> And the government is already imposing a tax on every consumption.

The more people who consume a lot They are taxing a lot.
>>> The more people who consume a lot They are taxing a lot.
 
It is more natural I think.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136721 HOMEWORK FOR 04.25.2024 WRITING TASK: Which restaurant and food... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 5
136720 Vocabulary ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 1050
136719 Deadline ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 1047
136718 What are your thoughts on the idea that ¡°cheap clothes are not... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 1155
136717 Harry portter ÀÌ*³ë ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 875
136716 The risks of not taking risks ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 1089
136715 The life of government official is diffrent from what I expected! ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 856
136714 Describe a language you have learned ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 1
136713 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 0
136712 What advice can you give a friend who is suffering from chronic... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 1035
136711 Think about vegetarianism and why you think it is not applicable... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-25 1054
136710 What country influences Korean cuisine? ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2024-04-24 1181
136709 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-24 963
136708 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-24 1
136707 Which ad is the most memorable to you? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-24 1
136706 homework 04.24 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-04-24 1127
136705 How good are you at playing sports? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-24 964
136704 What\'s your greatest strength? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-04-24 855
136703 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-24 1
136702 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-24 884

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04