¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Are you good at managing your time? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Â÷*Çõ
2024-04-21 1309

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I am good at managing my time, I plan my schedule for the day times in the morning.
I usually study from 9 am to 2 or 3pm in school and l go to Taekwondo center and come home study.
After finish studying, I watch TV or play games.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello again, Jimmy! 

I'm sending you your corrected composition. As always, please note the corrections

Here's your corrected composition, Jimmy. Please take note of some corrections (punctuation mark, such as comma or period/full stop - whether you need them or not) and the alternative sentences. Good evening there! 


Cheers,
Jean~~





                           Are you good at managing your time? Explain your answer.




Yes, I am good at managing my time, I plan my schedule for the day times in the morning.
>> Yes, I am good at managing my time. I plan my schedule for the daytime in the morning.

I usually study from 9 am to 2 or 3pm in school and l go to Taekwondo center and come home study.
>> I usually study from 9 am to 2 or 3 pm in school then go to the Taekwondo center and come home to study.

After finish studying, I watch TV or play games.
>> OR: After finishing my scheduled activities, I watch TV or play games. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134686 Aside from Korean and English, what do you think is the most... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1
134685 What one important thing would you buy with your savings today?... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 0
134684 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1
134683 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 2
134682 Having a collateral ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1347
134681 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1376
134680 What do you think of Michelin restaurants? Are they worth the... ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1
134679 English ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1412
134678 How are you going to define love? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1201
134677 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 109
134676 Do you agree that white chocolate is sweeter than regular... ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1509
134675 What sports do you play? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 0
134674 homework 02.14 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1604
134673 2023.02.14 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 4
134672 Homework ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 850
134671 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1440
134670 Will you allow your parents to interfere with your goal in the... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 979
134669 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 2
134668 Describe spending a perfect day with your family?What would... ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 2624
134667 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1630

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04