¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 04.16

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-04-16 2256

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What could be the reasons why some siblings end up having a bad blood with each other?

Sometimes, we want to live a rich life.
Because they seems to live a wealth life, they seems don't have any problems and worries about money.
But, there is no big difference between people's life.
And also rich people have pain in their life just like others too.
It means, I think the most common beef about something is a money problem, a financial, and legacy inheritance between siblings .
Most people's greed has no limits.
Because, whether we have a lot or a little, we want to have more.
In old Korea, we had prefers sons over daughters culture.
So, until the my parents' generation, only first son was given a inheritance.
But, rest of the son and daughters didn't receive it.
So the beef between the brothers became worse.
Sometimes the most common case I watched on the another country's news is the inheritance problem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What could be the reasons why some siblings end up having a bad blood with each other?


Sometimes, we want to live a rich life.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Sometimes, we want to live a wealthy life.
Because they seems to live a wealth life, they seems don't have any problems and worries about money.
>> That's because they seem to live a wealthy life, they don't have any problems and worries about money.
But, there is no big difference between people's life.
>> But, there is no big difference between people's lives.
And also rich people have pain in their life just like others, too.
>> And also, rich people have pain in their lives just like others, too.
It means, I think the most common beef about something is a money problem, a financial, and legacy inheritance between siblings.
>> It means, I think the most common beef about something is money or finances, and legacy inheritance between siblings.
Most people's greed has no limits.
>> CORRECT!
Because, whether we have a lot or a little, we want to have more.
>> CORRECT!
In old Korea, we had prefers sons over daughters culture.
>> In old Korea, we used to prefer sons over daughters in our culture.
So, until the my parents' generation, only first son was given a inheritance.
>> So, until the my parents' generation, only the first son was given an inheritance.
But, rest of the son and daughters didn't receive it.
>> But, the rest of the sons and daughters don't receive anything.
So the beef between the brothers became worse.
>> CORRECT!
Sometimes the most common case I watched on the another country's news is the inheritance problem.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135212 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2027
135211 Do you think the Korean education system is perfect for society? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2146
135210 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 0
135209 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1604
135208 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 0
135207 A dependable person ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1839
135206 Question about \\\'Compared to\\\' Á¤*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2697
135205 Page.11 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 3
135204 Was I rude in the subway? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2253
135203 homework 03.04 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1995
135202 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1839
135201 2023.03Á¦.4 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2
135200 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1
135199 Homework ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1
135198 Are you afraid of a snake? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1549
135197 What do you like about traveling ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2158
135196 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1980
135195 Compare living with roommates with living alone. Which living... ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 2331
135194 What other training do you have about airlines? õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 1359
135193 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Do you want... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-03-04 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04