¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 04.16

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-04-16 395

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What could be the reasons why some siblings end up having a bad blood with each other?

Sometimes, we want to live a rich life.
Because they seems to live a wealth life, they seems don't have any problems and worries about money.
But, there is no big difference between people's life.
And also rich people have pain in their life just like others too.
It means, I think the most common beef about something is a money problem, a financial, and legacy inheritance between siblings .
Most people's greed has no limits.
Because, whether we have a lot or a little, we want to have more.
In old Korea, we had prefers sons over daughters culture.
So, until the my parents' generation, only first son was given a inheritance.
But, rest of the son and daughters didn't receive it.
So the beef between the brothers became worse.
Sometimes the most common case I watched on the another country's news is the inheritance problem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What could be the reasons why some siblings end up having a bad blood with each other?


Sometimes, we want to live a rich life.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Sometimes, we want to live a wealthy life.
Because they seems to live a wealth life, they seems don't have any problems and worries about money.
>> That's because they seem to live a wealthy life, they don't have any problems and worries about money.
But, there is no big difference between people's life.
>> But, there is no big difference between people's lives.
And also rich people have pain in their life just like others, too.
>> And also, rich people have pain in their lives just like others, too.
It means, I think the most common beef about something is a money problem, a financial, and legacy inheritance between siblings.
>> It means, I think the most common beef about something is money or finances, and legacy inheritance between siblings.
Most people's greed has no limits.
>> CORRECT!
Because, whether we have a lot or a little, we want to have more.
>> CORRECT!
In old Korea, we had prefers sons over daughters culture.
>> In old Korea, we used to prefer sons over daughters in our culture.
So, until the my parents' generation, only first son was given a inheritance.
>> So, until the my parents' generation, only the first son was given an inheritance.
But, rest of the son and daughters didn't receive it.
>> But, the rest of the sons and daughters don't receive anything.
So the beef between the brothers became worse.
>> CORRECT!
Sometimes the most common case I watched on the another country's news is the inheritance problem.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138082 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1
138081 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 503
138080 Do you think buffet restaurants are worth their price? Why or... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 497
138079 Household duties ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 536
138078 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 3
138077 Homework ³ª*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138076 What kind of movies do you like watching at a movie theater? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 359
138075 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138074 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138073 purchases ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138072 What fruit or fruits that aren\'t available in Korea would you... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 481
138071 What are the things you enjoy most? Write at least two and... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 532
138070 junk food ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2
138069 How do you avoid arguments? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 486
138068 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138067 What do you think is the worst toy ever created for children?... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2
138066 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 568
138065 Are there many people of different cultures in your country? Are... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 456
138064 How does jealousy affect people? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2
138063 What do you think are the main challenges food stall owners face... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 536

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04