¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Something I would risk my life

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾ç*¿¬
2024-04-15 400

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my forties, I was busy expanding my academies. I once ran three academies. All of my attention was focused on my academies. I didn't take care of myself, didn't have enough time to relax, and even ignored any symptoms of my body. Eventually I had a severe surgery of womb extraction. The doctor scolded me for neglecting the cyst in my womb. He said that the cyst would have become a malignant tumor if I had come a little later. After four-hour surgery, I had to get transfusions for three days. I thought severe workaholic took a risk our lives.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Gi Yean!
First, I want to commend you for using the word "transfusion". It shows how eager you are in applying the words we've learned. Also, it's a good thing that you went to the doctor before the sickness became incurable. I'm happy to hear that in our lesson you said you won't risk your life again just to obtain something. It shows that you are now prioritizing health more than anything else.
- T. Caitlyn
In my forties, I was busy expanding my academies. 
>> CORRECT
I once ran three academies. 
>> CORRECT
All of my attention was focused on my academies. 
>> CORRECT
I didn't take care of myself, didn't have enough time to relax, and even ignored any symptoms of my body. 
>> CORRECT 
Eventually I had a severe surgery of womb extraction. 
>> Eventually, I had major surgery for womb extraction. 
The doctor scolded me for neglecting the cyst in my womb. 
>> CORRECT 
He said that the cyst would have become a malignant tumor if I had come a little later. 
>> CORRECT 
After four-hour surgery, I had to get transfusions for three days. 
>> CORRECT 
I thought severe workaholic took a risk our lives.
>> I thought being a severe workaholic was risking our lives.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134962 Importance of beauty ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-02-24 233
134961 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-24 2
134960 For foreign movies, do you prefer movies with Korean/English... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-02-24 248
134959 2023.02.23 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-02-24 0
134958 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-24 0
134957 Please correct the sentence Julia ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-02-24 3
134956 Write about ont of your memeorable birthday celebrations. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 340
134955 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 604
134954 homework 02.23 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 435
134953 Discuss the pros and cons of using public transportation versus... ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 363
134952 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 2
134951 Buying the stuff I need ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 240
134950 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 0
134949 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 267
134948 2/20 homework ³ë*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 1
134947 homework ÇÑ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 2
134946 HOMEWORK Ȳ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 249
134945 Some people think it¡¯s a good idea to wear a uniform at work. ÀÓ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 884
134944 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 0
134943 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04