¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Something I would risk my life

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾ç*¿¬
2024-04-15 349

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my forties, I was busy expanding my academies. I once ran three academies. All of my attention was focused on my academies. I didn't take care of myself, didn't have enough time to relax, and even ignored any symptoms of my body. Eventually I had a severe surgery of womb extraction. The doctor scolded me for neglecting the cyst in my womb. He said that the cyst would have become a malignant tumor if I had come a little later. After four-hour surgery, I had to get transfusions for three days. I thought severe workaholic took a risk our lives.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Gi Yean!
First, I want to commend you for using the word "transfusion". It shows how eager you are in applying the words we've learned. Also, it's a good thing that you went to the doctor before the sickness became incurable. I'm happy to hear that in our lesson you said you won't risk your life again just to obtain something. It shows that you are now prioritizing health more than anything else.
- T. Caitlyn
In my forties, I was busy expanding my academies. 
>> CORRECT
I once ran three academies. 
>> CORRECT
All of my attention was focused on my academies. 
>> CORRECT
I didn't take care of myself, didn't have enough time to relax, and even ignored any symptoms of my body. 
>> CORRECT 
Eventually I had a severe surgery of womb extraction. 
>> Eventually, I had major surgery for womb extraction. 
The doctor scolded me for neglecting the cyst in my womb. 
>> CORRECT 
He said that the cyst would have become a malignant tumor if I had come a little later. 
>> CORRECT 
After four-hour surgery, I had to get transfusions for three days. 
>> CORRECT 
I thought severe workaholic took a risk our lives.
>> I thought being a severe workaholic was risking our lives.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135419 Wrong advice ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-12 465
135418 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-12 2
135417 What do you do to get the things that you desire? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-12 531
135416 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 280
135415 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 2
135414 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 2
135413 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 281
135412 On the road ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 407
135411 homework 03.11 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 389
135410 What is the importance of kindness in everyday life? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 593
135409 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 303
135408 2023.03.8 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 426
135407 Do you feel comfortable talking to a boss or client by phone?... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 317
135406 2023.03.11 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 4
135405 Homework ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 239
135404 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 495
135403 Do you think teachers should be strict sometimes? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 435
135402 Should we always do our best in everything that we do? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 394
135401 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Would you... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 3
135400 How does facing and overcoming fears help people grow as... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04