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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Tell me about the most fashionable person you know?

작성자: 박*호
2024-04-05 407

회원님의 영작문

While Korean women are very interested in fashion and spend a lot of money on clothes, shoes, and accessories, Korean men have not been very interested in fashion.
I was also insensitive to fashion, so I always wore black shoes, a white shirt, and a dark-colored suit when I went to work.
However, these days, Korean men are also becoming more and more interested in fashion.
My eldest daughter gives me a lot of advice that I should pay attention to fashion in order to look good as I get older.
Meanwhile, I was recently surprised to see the clothes and hairstyle of a friend at work.
Even though he was a middle-aged man around my age, he chose shoes that matched his suit and wore a brightly colored shirt.
And he also appeared wearing a famous brand buckle.
In addition, he dyed and permed his hair.
Although it looked strange at first, he looked more stylish as time went by.
I am insensitive to trends, but I plan to become more interested in fashion like my company friend.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Happy Friday, Sun! 

Fashion is an incredibly powerful form of self-expression. It can be used to express identity, beliefs, and personal style. By embracing individuality in fashion, individuals are able to set themselves apart from others in ways that make them feel unique and confident. 

- Kristine ^^ 

While Korean women are very interested in fashion and spend a lot of money on clothes, shoes, and accessories, Korean men have not been very interested in fashion.
>> Korean men do not exhibit much interest in fashion, despite Korean women's strong interest in it and their tendency to spend a lot of money on clothing, shoes, and accessories.
I was also insensitive to fashion, so I always wore black shoes, a white shirt, and a dark-colored suit when I went to work.
>> I also have no concern about fashion, I always wear a dark suit, white blouse, and black shoes to work.
However, these days, Korean men are also becoming more and more interested in fashion.
>> Correct. 
My eldest daughter gives me a lot of advice that I should pay attention to fashion in order to look good as I get older.
>> My eldest daughter is always telling me to pay attention to fashion to look good as i get older.
Meanwhile, I was recently surprised to see the clothes and hairstyle of a friend at work.
>> Meanwhile, I recently noticed a friend's attire and haircut at work, which startled me.
Even though he was a middle-aged man around my age, he chose shoes that matched his suit and wore a brightly colored shirt.
>> Even though he is a middle-aged man around my age, he wears a vividly colored shirt and shoes that complement his suit.
And he also appeared wearing a famous brand buckle.
>> He also shows up wearing a buckle from a well-known brand.
In addition, he dyed and permed his hair.
>> In addition, he perms and dyes his hair.
Although it looked strange at first, he looked more stylish as time went by.
>> He appears odd at first, but over time, he gets more stylish.
I am insensitive to trends, but I plan to become more interested in fashion like my company friend.
>> Although I don't follow trends, I do have plans to start being more interested in fashion like my coworker.
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
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04

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