¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why are some people pessimists?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: õ*Àº
2024-04-04 304

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

For my opinion, pessimistic people are made by their experiences, not just naturally born.
We experience many things during living, even though that is bad or good.
Pessimistic people tend to think deeply on the situation and think like pros and cons, consequence.
They want to achieve the best results, and that why some people are pessimists.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Rachel!

It is great to have you back here on the composition page! This time, let us hone your skills more intensively so that you can use them for your future career endeavors.

I totally agree with your ideas. Pessimists can measure and calculate the risks and sometimes go beyond their worries and overact about them. In this way, it may seem negative since they see the dark side of situations. However, if they do not acknowledge the bad side of things, it may also blind them from achieving a clear goal- this may be the downfall of an over optimist.

Nevertheless, a balance of optimism and pessimism is the best combination to live life better.

Take a look at the underscored grammar suggestions below. They are on diction, the determiner 'the', and the linking very 'is". Overall, you did great on this task. Carry on!

See you tomorrow!

-T. Donna~

For my opinion, pessimistic people are made by their experiences, not just naturally born.
>> Correct!

We experience many things during living, even though that is bad or good.
>> We experience many things while living, even though that is bad or good.

Pessimistic people tend to think deeply on the situation and think like pros and cons, consequence.
>> Pessimistic people tend to think deeply on the situation and think about the pros and cons.

They want to achieve the best results, and that why some people are pessimists.
>>  They want to achieve the best results, and that is why some people are pessimists.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137506 Preparing for potential risks ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-30 494
137505 2024.05.30 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-05-30 2
137504 Who was your travel buddy when you were not married yet? ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2024-05-30 450
137503 homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-30 525
137502 What kind of small lies are acceptable to you? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-05-30 556
137501 If you will cook something for someone who will it be and why... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 1
137500 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 1
137499 What food do you want to learn to cook? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 1
137498 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 0
137497 homework 05.29 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 516
137496 howework ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 0
137495 Homework ½Å*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 4
137494 Pronunciation drill ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 875
137493 2024.05.28 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 536
137492 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 442
137491 trip ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 0
137490 impression ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 1
137489 5/29(Wed.) homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 507
137488 If you could change one thing in the world, what would it be? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 460
137487 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-29 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04