¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why are some people pessimists?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: õ*Àº
2024-04-04 311

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

For my opinion, pessimistic people are made by their experiences, not just naturally born.
We experience many things during living, even though that is bad or good.
Pessimistic people tend to think deeply on the situation and think like pros and cons, consequence.
They want to achieve the best results, and that why some people are pessimists.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Rachel!

It is great to have you back here on the composition page! This time, let us hone your skills more intensively so that you can use them for your future career endeavors.

I totally agree with your ideas. Pessimists can measure and calculate the risks and sometimes go beyond their worries and overact about them. In this way, it may seem negative since they see the dark side of situations. However, if they do not acknowledge the bad side of things, it may also blind them from achieving a clear goal- this may be the downfall of an over optimist.

Nevertheless, a balance of optimism and pessimism is the best combination to live life better.

Take a look at the underscored grammar suggestions below. They are on diction, the determiner 'the', and the linking very 'is". Overall, you did great on this task. Carry on!

See you tomorrow!

-T. Donna~

For my opinion, pessimistic people are made by their experiences, not just naturally born.
>> Correct!

We experience many things during living, even though that is bad or good.
>> We experience many things while living, even though that is bad or good.

Pessimistic people tend to think deeply on the situation and think like pros and cons, consequence.
>> Pessimistic people tend to think deeply on the situation and think about the pros and cons.

They want to achieve the best results, and that why some people are pessimists.
>>  They want to achieve the best results, and that is why some people are pessimists.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137613 What insect are you most afraid of? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 436
137612 homework 06.04 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 439
137611 What do you think is the best pet in the world? Why? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 530
137610 2024.06.03 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 350
137609 Someone who commit crimes for some good cause should also be... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 524
137608 The Episode About My Jaywalking ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 311
137607 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 487
137606 Are you afraid of going on scary amusement park rides? Do you... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 549
137605 Do any flowers have a special meaning in your country? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 0
137604 euphoric ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 1
137603 HOMEWORK FOR 06.04.2024 ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 4
137602 trust ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 2
137601 Do you prefer cooking at home or eating out? why? ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 1
137600 If tasked with repurposing plastic bags into a new product, what... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 2
137599 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 539
137598 Do you think being punctual is important? Why or why not? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 524
137597 What was the last great news you\'ve heard on TV or the... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 445
137596 What is the best age to be and why? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 410
137595 If someone were to visit your hometown for a day, what itinerary... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 541
137594 Are there any plants that people think bring bad luck in your... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 621

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04