¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you agree that a kid\'s accomplishment is the parent\'s accomplishment as well? Why or Why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Áö
2024-04-01 564

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I agree that a kid's accomplishment is the parent's accomplishment as well. Most kids gain senses of accomplishment through their growth from birth. They can make eye contact with their parents, turn their bodies upside down, sit down, stand, walk, and run. In this process, their parents feel a sense of accomplishment as well. In addition, children experience emotions of joy, anger, love, sadness, and despair in their lives, and parents also feel these emotions and grow up together.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Jamie,
It was nice reading your composition. You did well! :)
~ T. Demi ^^

I agree that a kid's accomplishment is the parent's accomplishment as well. 

CORRECT!
Most kids gain senses of accomplishment through their growth from birth. 
>> Most kids gain a sense of accomplishment through their growth from birth.
They can make eye contact with their parents, turn their bodies upside down, sit down, stand, walk, and run.
CORRECT!
In this process, their parents feel a sense of accomplishment as well. 
CORRECT!
OR>> This process also brings a sense of accomplishment to their parents.
In addition, children experience emotions of joy, anger, love, sadness, and despair in their lives, and parents also feel these emotions and grow up together.
>> In addition, children experience a range of emotions including joy, anger, love, sadness, and despair in their lives, and parents also share these emotions as they grow together.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136857 30.Apr.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-01 2
136856 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-01 408
136855 When do you usually listen to music? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-05-01 0
136854 Why is there a strong demand for language skills? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-05-01 0
136853 Page.3 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-05-01 0
136852 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 4
136851 What do you think is the most effective way of advertising... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 2
136850 What are the advantages of having a big family? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 407
136849 What do you think of the rainy season? How do you feel when it... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 356
136848 homework 04.30 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 373
136847 Choose the correct preposition for the following sentences: 1.... ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 420
136846 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 1
136845 Why do you think Korean dramas are so popular? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 0
136844 What do you think is the most useful thing in the world? Explain. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 0
136843 Fears ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 451
136842 What are some good things to ask someone you just met? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 297
136841 my school ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 584
136840 What most worries you about global warming? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 622
136839 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 481
136838 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-30 468

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04