¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.28

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-28 425

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What positive things can the world learn from your country?

It's a long time since I introduce the positive parts of our country.
My country also has advantages and positive things, but the media and other things always showed only the negative side.
For example, an American writer posted a video about Korea title " The most depressed country in the world".
I'm also agree, I think a lot of people's mental theses days are has anger, sensitive, and easily get depression more than before.
But, I want to find positive(advantages) things and let many people know.
This time I'll introduce the Public transport system in South Korea.
This system is even if I transfer several times, I can use public transportation at a low price.
And, we can go to most of metropolitan area use the bus and subway.
In addition, high-speed railways has completed, we can move from suburban areas to the center of Seoul very quickly.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What positive things can the world learn from your country?


It's a long time since I introduce the positive parts of our country.
>> It's been a long time since I introduced the positive parts of our country.
My country also has advantages and positive things, but the media and other things always showed only the negative side.
>> CORRECT!
For example, an American writer posted a video about Korea title " The most depressed country in the world".
>> For example, an American writer posted a video about South Korea entitled " The most depressed country in the world".
I'm also agree, I think a lot of people's mental theses days are has anger, sensitive, and easily get depression more than before.
>> I also agree, I think a lot of people's mindset these days include anger, sensitivity, and depression more than before.
But, I want to find positive(advantages) things and let many people know.
>> CORRECT!
This time I'll introduce the Public transport system in South Korea.
>> CORRECT!
This system is even if I transfer several times, I can use public transportation at a low price.
>> This transportation system is good because even if I transfer several times, I can use the public transportation at a low price.
And, we can go to most of metropolitan area use the bus and subway.
>> And, we can go to most metropolitan areas using the bus and subway.
In addition, high-speed railways has completed, we can move from suburban areas to the center of Seoul very quickly.
>> In addition, high-speed railways are completed, we can move from suburban areas to the center of Seoul very quickly.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135641 Mukbang ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 291
135640 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 6
135639 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 660
135638 Why do you think some people don\'t report being scammed? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 308
135637 Do you believe in the saying \"friends are the family we... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 335
135636 How often do you watch TV? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1
135635 What are some of the major changes that occur to people... ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 3
135634 Describe a positive change in your life ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1
135633 HOMEWORK: When is the best day to take a day off? Why? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 322
135632 homework ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 394
135631 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 322
135630 Should parents help their children plan their future? ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 3
135629 HOMEWORK FOR 03.19.2024 WRITING TASK: What was your most... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 2
135628 What questions don¡¯t you mind people asking you? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 3
135627 Homework 3/19 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 4
135626 Paying for some advice ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 272
135625 HOMEWORK - What is a busy day like for you? How do you handle it? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 332
135624 Body parts / ½ÅüºÎÀ§ ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 2
135623 homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 407
135622 homework - what makes a person feel unsuessful? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 559

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04