¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.28

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-28 416

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What positive things can the world learn from your country?

It's a long time since I introduce the positive parts of our country.
My country also has advantages and positive things, but the media and other things always showed only the negative side.
For example, an American writer posted a video about Korea title " The most depressed country in the world".
I'm also agree, I think a lot of people's mental theses days are has anger, sensitive, and easily get depression more than before.
But, I want to find positive(advantages) things and let many people know.
This time I'll introduce the Public transport system in South Korea.
This system is even if I transfer several times, I can use public transportation at a low price.
And, we can go to most of metropolitan area use the bus and subway.
In addition, high-speed railways has completed, we can move from suburban areas to the center of Seoul very quickly.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What positive things can the world learn from your country?


It's a long time since I introduce the positive parts of our country.
>> It's been a long time since I introduced the positive parts of our country.
My country also has advantages and positive things, but the media and other things always showed only the negative side.
>> CORRECT!
For example, an American writer posted a video about Korea title " The most depressed country in the world".
>> For example, an American writer posted a video about South Korea entitled " The most depressed country in the world".
I'm also agree, I think a lot of people's mental theses days are has anger, sensitive, and easily get depression more than before.
>> I also agree, I think a lot of people's mindset these days include anger, sensitivity, and depression more than before.
But, I want to find positive(advantages) things and let many people know.
>> CORRECT!
This time I'll introduce the Public transport system in South Korea.
>> CORRECT!
This system is even if I transfer several times, I can use public transportation at a low price.
>> This transportation system is good because even if I transfer several times, I can use the public transportation at a low price.
And, we can go to most of metropolitan area use the bus and subway.
>> And, we can go to most metropolitan areas using the bus and subway.
In addition, high-speed railways has completed, we can move from suburban areas to the center of Seoul very quickly.
>> In addition, high-speed railways are completed, we can move from suburban areas to the center of Seoul very quickly.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135757 What¡¯s your favorite shop? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 1
135756 Do you prefer shopping alone or with others? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 1
135755 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 2
135754 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 424
135753 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 334
135752 homework 03.21 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 335
135751 What is your view of men using cosmetics? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 2
135750 What are your hobbies? Write at least two hobbies and explain... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 459
135749 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 0
135748 What kind of vehicle would you like to have in the future?... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 378
135747 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 0
135746 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 1
135745 What can you do better when you are alone? Write at least two... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 4
135744 Children ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 234
135743 Daydreaming ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 389
135742 Describe a friend who has played an important part in your life. ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 464
135741 My Homework ±è*Á¦ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 244
135740 What will be the most expensive purchase you will make with your... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 1
135739 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 440
135738 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What will you... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04