¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*¼±
2024-03-28 805

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

One of the most common ways to lose weight is to reduce the amount of food you eat. However, excessive dietary restrictions can cause harm to your health. Another common way to lose weight is by exercising. However, when overdone, it can also have an adverse effect on our bodies and minds. One of the most common mistakes of dieting is by eating insufficient nutrients. Our bodies need various nutrients, and a lack of these essential nutrients can put our health at risk.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Mia! Thank you for writing your homework. Indeed, we need to ensure that we are getting the essential nutrients every day, even when we are on a diet. Well done! 
-Khai

One of the most common ways to lose weight is to reduce the amount of food you eat. 

>> CORRECT

OR

>> Reducing the amount of food you eat is one of the most common ways to lose weight.

However, excessive dietary restrictions can cause harm to your health. 

>> CORRECT

Another common way to lose weight is by exercising. 

>> CORRECT
OR

>> In addition, exercising is a common way to lose weight.

However, when overdone, it can also have an adverse effect on our bodies and minds. 

>> CORRECT

OR

>> But when it is overdone, it can have a negative effect on our bodies and minds.

One of the most common mistakes of dieting is by eating insufficient nutrients. 

>> One of the most common mistakes in dieting is eating insufficient nutrients.

Our bodies need various nutrients, and a lack of these essential nutrients can put our health at risk.

>> CORRECT

OR

>> Our bodies need various vitamins and minerals, and a lack of these can put our health at risk.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135833 Is there any holiday in other country that you wish Korea is... ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 1037
135832 What would you do if you could invisible for one day? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 892
135831 Do you think Mondays are the best or worst day of the week? Why? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 1
135830 Is it good to have foreign friends? Why? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 1105
135829 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Why would you... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 1
135828 What activities do you enjoy doing with your younger sister? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 1201
135827 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 827
135826 cathedral ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 1
135825 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 675
135824 Is it acceptable to use animals for experiments and research? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 1322
135823 What was your first experience like when you started learning to... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 945
135822 WRITING TASK: What are the potential health risks associated... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 3
135821 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 1
135820 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 791
135819 How do you deal with your worries? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 2
135818 What makes our travels better? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 9
135817 Do you easily trust strangers? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 762
135816 What are some beautiful waterfall hikes that you would recommend... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 738
135815 What advice can you give someone who is facing so many... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 13
135814 What is \'Throwback Thursday\' (#TBT) on social media? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-25 713

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04