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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

My advice about life to elementary students

작성자: 김*민
2024-03-28 770

회원님의 영작문

First, I want to tell to kids that "Life is not in the order of grades", so you don't have to only focus on studying.
But I have to emphasize importance of studying how to socialize with friends. For example, people have to realize that their actions aren't always right, and when people do something wrong, they should apologize.

Second, I want to give an advice that your dream may not be come true, and your life may doesn't go your own way.
This advice results from my experience. I wanted to be a writer, a publisher, or a teacher who teaches Korean to foreign students.
But now, I'm a government official in the field of social welfare despite I didn't work as a social worker!
Nevertheless, I would like to add that you have to explore what you like and can do well, study hard to achieve your dreams. And even if your dreams do not come true, you should be an adult who do your best in the given tasks.

And last, I emphasize that I hope you would be safe and healthy in your whole life!

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Great work, Min! You have written a very meaningful answer in your homework. I believe that these realizations and advice will really help a young person.
-Khai
First, I want to tell to kids that "Life is not in the order of grades", so you don't have to only focus on studying.
>> First, I want to tell my kids that, "life is not in the order of grades," so you don't have to only focus on studying.

But I have to emphasize importance of studying how to socialize with friends. 

>> But I have to emphasize the importance of studying how to socialize with friends.

For example, people have to realize that their actions aren't always right, and when people do something wrong, they should apologize.

>> CORRECT

Second, I want to give an advice that your dream may not be come true, and your life may doesn't go your own way.

>> Second, I want to give the advice that your dream may not come true, and your life may not go your way.

This advice results from my experience. 

>> CORRECT

OR

>> This advice was based on my experience.

I wanted to be a writer, a publisher, or a teacher who teaches Korean to foreign students.

>> CORRECT

But now, I'm a government official in the field of social welfare despite I didn't work as a social worker!

>> But now, I'm a government official in the field of social welfare, despite the fact that I didn't work as a social worker!

Nevertheless, I would like to add that you have to explore what you like and can do well, study hard to achieve your dreams. 

>> Nevertheless, I would like to add that you have to explore what you like and can do well and study hard to achieve your dreams.

And even if your dreams do not come true, you should be an adult who do your best in the given tasks.

>> And even if your dreams do not come true, you should be an adult who does your best at any given task.

And last, I emphasize that I hope you would be safe and healthy in your whole life!

>> And last, I emphasize that I hope you will be safe and healthy your whole life!


번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
139503 Homework 3 위*아 완료 2024-08-27 13
139502 Who do you think is the best author in Korea or the world? 차*진 완료 2024-08-27 456
139501 Do your ever give up waiting for people who are late? How long... 차*혁 완료 2024-08-27 357
139500 Homework 김*우 완료 2024-08-27 4
139499 homework 심*진 완료 2024-08-27 0
139498 My hobby is to play basketball 신*라 완료 2024-08-27 414
139497 Homework 김*숙 완료 2024-08-27 405
139496 Homework 송*민 완료 2024-08-27 1
139495 People on a diet 이*규 완료 2024-08-27 467
139494 What did you do at a cafe? 김*빈 완료 2024-08-27 4
139493 Homework 류*우 완료 2024-08-27 453
139492 Homework 권*미 완료 2024-08-27 0
139491 Home sick 김*빈 완료 2024-08-27 4
139490 8/27(Tue) homework 김*희 완료 2024-08-27 200
139489 Write about the importance of setting goals. How do personal... 현* 완료 2024-08-27 196
139488 What do you need today? Why? 안*진 완료 2024-08-27 4
139487 ask 민*정 완료 2024-08-27 0
139486 What should you do to be more confident on your next examination? 최*정 완료 2024-08-27 1
139485 What did you enjoy doing in your free time when you were a kid? 최*정 완료 2024-08-27 2
139484 In what situations do you think it’s beneficial to be reserved? 박*호 완료 2024-08-27 408

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주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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03
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04

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