¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: Describe your dream place to live.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2024-03-27 577

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

my dream place is just one

it's a two floor house (the second floor is all my house),
and i wish there was large yard,
when my dog can run around.

this house is very expensive in korea.

so i'll never able to buy it..

or big park around to my house.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Eve~
While reading your composition, I appreciate how you include your dog... You must really love your pet <3 Well, even if it seems impossible now, I still hope that one day we may have enough money to buy our dream home. 
Chammy
my dream place is just one
>> My dream place is just one.
OR
>> I only have one dream place to live in.
it's a two floor house (the second floor is all my house),
>> It's a two-floor house where the second floor entirely belongs to me.
OR
>>It's a two-story house, and I own the entire second level.
and i wish there was large yard, when my dog can run around.
>> And I wish there was a large yard where my dog could walk around.
or big park around to my house.
>> Or a big park around my place.
OR
>> Or a cozy park near my house. 
this house is very expensive in korea.
>> This kind of house is very expensive in Korea.
so i'll never able to buy it..
>> So, I'll never be able to buy it.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135271 Do you like at dinosaurs skeletons and bones in museum or... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 721
135270 Bullies ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 716
135269 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 918
135268 Homework ¹Ú*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 702
135267 1. Why did you decide to apply for this position? ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 828
135266 In your opinion, is it better to specialize in a specific area... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 884
135265 HOMEWORK FOR 03.06.2024 WRITING TASK: How do you stay motivated... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 4
135264 When do you prefer having a family gathering? ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 772
135263 What qualities do you value in a friend? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1009
135262 My boyfriend ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 753
135261 Have you asked for a replacement for anything? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 3
135260 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 2
135259 Who are the people you always check on? ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 0
135258 What kind of person would be the perfect neighbor? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 3
135257 In what situation you would agree to sleep over at a friend\'s... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 2
135256 Getting an apologize ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1201
135255 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 983
135254 What was your first day at work like? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 4
135253 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 3
135252 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-03-05 1476

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04