¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: Describe your dream place to live.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2024-03-27 348

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

my dream place is just one

it's a two floor house (the second floor is all my house),
and i wish there was large yard,
when my dog can run around.

this house is very expensive in korea.

so i'll never able to buy it..

or big park around to my house.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Eve~
While reading your composition, I appreciate how you include your dog... You must really love your pet <3 Well, even if it seems impossible now, I still hope that one day we may have enough money to buy our dream home. 
Chammy
my dream place is just one
>> My dream place is just one.
OR
>> I only have one dream place to live in.
it's a two floor house (the second floor is all my house),
>> It's a two-floor house where the second floor entirely belongs to me.
OR
>>It's a two-story house, and I own the entire second level.
and i wish there was large yard, when my dog can run around.
>> And I wish there was a large yard where my dog could walk around.
or big park around to my house.
>> Or a big park around my place.
OR
>> Or a cozy park near my house. 
this house is very expensive in korea.
>> This kind of house is very expensive in Korea.
so i'll never able to buy it..
>> So, I'll never be able to buy it.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137632 Compare and contrast the perspectives on obesity presented in... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 526
137631 HOMEWORK FOR 06.05.2024 ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 4
137630 Describe your first job interview. ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 542
137629 What makes it easy/difficult to land a high-paying job in your... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 493
137628 What¡¯s the best way to get things done on time? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 1
137627 What does art mean to you personally? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 501
137626 How do you stay conscious of your health and well-being? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 461
137625 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 459
137624 6/3 home work Àå*ÈÞ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 2
137623 Challenges next generation will face with ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 379
137622 ¡°Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.¡± What do you think this... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 506
137621 4.Jun.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 1
137620 31.May.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 1
137619 What is one thing you have never done but would like to do? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 516
137618 simple but expensive ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 319
137617 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 3
137616 a bottle of SOJU ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 503
137615 Famous Korean movie lines ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 567
137614 What was the nicest place you saw abroad? Explain. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 541
137613 What insect are you most afraid of? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-06-04 440

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04