¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: Describe your dream place to live.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2024-03-27 379

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

my dream place is just one

it's a two floor house (the second floor is all my house),
and i wish there was large yard,
when my dog can run around.

this house is very expensive in korea.

so i'll never able to buy it..

or big park around to my house.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Eve~
While reading your composition, I appreciate how you include your dog... You must really love your pet <3 Well, even if it seems impossible now, I still hope that one day we may have enough money to buy our dream home. 
Chammy
my dream place is just one
>> My dream place is just one.
OR
>> I only have one dream place to live in.
it's a two floor house (the second floor is all my house),
>> It's a two-floor house where the second floor entirely belongs to me.
OR
>>It's a two-story house, and I own the entire second level.
and i wish there was large yard, when my dog can run around.
>> And I wish there was a large yard where my dog could walk around.
or big park around to my house.
>> Or a big park around my place.
OR
>> Or a cozy park near my house. 
this house is very expensive in korea.
>> This kind of house is very expensive in Korea.
so i'll never able to buy it..
>> So, I'll never be able to buy it.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138070 junk food ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2
138069 How do you avoid arguments? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 529
138068 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138067 What do you think is the worst toy ever created for children?... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2
138066 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 580
138065 Are there many people of different cultures in your country? Are... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 474
138064 How does jealousy affect people? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 2
138063 What do you think are the main challenges food stall owners face... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 597
138062 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 612
138061 HOMEWORK FOR 06.20.2024 WRITING TASK: Do you think Mother Nature... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 3
138060 Meals ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 353
138059 Share a personality trait that you have acquired through the... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 571
138058 The most common crime in Korea ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 5
138057 2024.06.24 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 603
138056 Poor person\'s being successful ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 514
138055 In what ways does cultural background influence one\'s... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 643
138054 What are the harmful and the beneficial effects of advertising? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 539
138053 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 561
138052 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 3
138051 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-24 347

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04