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homework 03.22

작성자: 최*�
2024-03-22 646

회원님의 영작문

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Have you ever heard of any food safety scandals in your country?

Food incidents often times happen in my country.
One example is, the largest food poisoning in 2018.
This case is, there was a cake in school lunch menu, bu this cake made a problem.
After lunch, some student got food poisoning.
But, there was a more big problem.
Because, a company supplies this cake to across the country schools.
So, many students got sick across the country in school.
Next, incidents is there are cases of group food poisoning that happen every year in my country.
This is oyster food poisoning.
Actually, everyone knows it well, we should be careful when we eat sea food and shellfish.
But, many people like to eat it raw.
So, everyone always said "be careful", but it's can't keep it.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Have you ever heard of any food safety scandals in your country?

Food incidents often times happen in my country.
>> CORRECT!
One example is, the largest food poisoning in 2018.
>> CORRECT!
This case is, there was a cake in school lunch menu, bu this cake made a problem.
>> This case is, there was a cake in the school's lunch menu, but this cake made a problem.
After lunch, some student got food poisoning.
>> After lunch, some students got food poisoned.
But, there was a more big problem.
>> But, there was a bigger problem.
Because, a company supplies this cake to across the country schools.
>> Because, a company supplies this cake across the country's schools.
So, many students got sick across the country in school.
>> So, many students got sick in schools across the country.
Next, incidents is there are cases of group food poisoning that happen every year in my country.
>> The next incident is that there are cases of group food poisoning that happen every year in my country.
This is oyster food poisoning. 
>> CORRECT!
Actually, everyone knows it well, we should be careful when we eat sea food and shellfish.
>> CORRECT!
But, many people like to eat it raw.
>> CORRECT!
So, everyone always said "be careful", but it's can't keep it.
>> So, everyone always says "be careful", but they can't keep it.

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