¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.20

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-20 360

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does contamination affect our health?

These days, many people are worried about environmental pollution.
So, there are many campaigns and movements to reduce contamination.
One of the reason why many people want to reduce contamination is health.
For example, if living for water, ground, and food are contaminated in the area where we live, we cannot live healthy.
And as a result, our life time will be reduce.
The contamination are affect to nature and animals.
Finally, I think this effect will follow to greater disaster for people like a butterfly effect.
But, I think the bigger problem is that a few worst companies secretly spill dangerous and contamination substances into the land or sea.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does contamination affect our health?


These days, many people are worried about the environmental pollution.
>> CORRECT!
So, there are many campaigns and movements to reduce contamination.
>> CORRECT!
One of the reason why many people want to reduce contamination is health.
>> One of the reasons why many people want to reduce contamination is because of health concerns.
For example, if living for water, ground, and food are contaminated in the area where we live, we cannot live healthy.
>> For example, if our sources like water, ground, and food are contaminated in the area where we live, we cannot live healthily.
And as a result, our life time will be reduce.
>> And as a result, the time of our lives will be reduced.
The contamination are affect to nature and animals.
>> The contamination also affects nature and animals.
Finally, I think this effect will follow to greater disaster for people like a butterfly effect.
>> Finally, I think this effect will lead to greater disasters to people like a butterfly effect.
But, I think the bigger problem is that a few worst companies secretly spill dangerous and contamination substances into the land or sea.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136389 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 3
136388 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 437
136387 April 12th\'s homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 294
136386 Do you think beauty pageants should focus more on inner beauty... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 256
136385 Homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 271
136384 What is the essence of flower festivals in your country? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 469
136383 Do you have any favorite springtime activities from your... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 302
136382 2024.04.12 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 263
136381 How have cars improved our lives or have caused more problems... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 205
136380 What do you think about putting in effort but no progress? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 292
136379 Something I would risk my life ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 382
136378 12.Apr.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 1
136377 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-15 2
136376 What do you like about living in your neighborhood? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 3
136375 How are your friendships different now than they were when you... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 325
136374 What do you borrow from your friends? ¸Í*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 339
136373 What do say when you want to know if a person needs help? Write... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 358
136372 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 2
136371 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 319
136370 HOMEWORK FOR 04.12.2024 WRITING TASK: Which chore do you like... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-14 5

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04