¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What things about Korea do you think Korean people are proud of?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*Àº
2024-03-19 1697

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't know what Korean people are most proud of.
But there is one thing I am most proud of.
That is Korea.
I am proud of Korea itself.
Because Korea exists, I also exist.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Sunny!
Great job!
Just take note of how you begin your sentences.
Avoid starting your sentences with conjunctions like "but" and "because."
Other than that, the composition was very smooth and clear.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I don't know what Korean people are most proud of.
>> Correct
But there is one thing I am most proud of.
>> However, there is one thing I am most proud of.
That is Korea.
>> Correct
I am proud of Korea itself.
>> Correct
Because Korea exists, I also exist.
>> It's because if Korea exists, I also exist.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132739 Ideal fitness program ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-25 2
132738 Ordering food in English ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-25 1
132737 If you could change one thing about your neighborhood, what... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-25 2555
132736 What does your school like? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-25 1514
132735 When are you most proud of your nationality? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-25 3
132734 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-25 3
132733 If you were to create your own fashion line, what would be the... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-11-25 2056
132732 What\'s the most important thing to do to handle and accept... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 1668
132731 What different ways are there to cook potatoes? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 1914
132730 Would you like dual nationality? What are the benefits? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 1
132729 The last time I stayed over ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 2098
132728 I go to karaoke when I\'m stressed out. ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 2
132727 homework 11.24 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 2172
132726 Would you rather clean your room or wash the dishes after dinner? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 1602
132725 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 1
132724 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 1475
132723 Do you think Christmas is the best holiday of the year? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 2314
132722 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it really... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 2
132721 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 2813
132720 Meeting the deadlines ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-24 2794

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04