¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What things about Korea do you think Korean people are proud of?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*Àº
2024-03-19 389

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't know what Korean people are most proud of.
But there is one thing I am most proud of.
That is Korea.
I am proud of Korea itself.
Because Korea exists, I also exist.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Sunny!
Great job!
Just take note of how you begin your sentences.
Avoid starting your sentences with conjunctions like "but" and "because."
Other than that, the composition was very smooth and clear.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I don't know what Korean people are most proud of.
>> Correct
But there is one thing I am most proud of.
>> However, there is one thing I am most proud of.
That is Korea.
>> Correct
I am proud of Korea itself.
>> Correct
Because Korea exists, I also exist.
>> It's because if Korea exists, I also exist.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136206 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 284
136205 If you have the chance to be a celebrity or influencer, which... õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 154
136204 What are the most common organizations in your country and what... ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 0
136203 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 2
136202 diary ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 325
136201 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 337
136200 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 350
136199 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 319
136198 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 330
136197 April 5th\'s homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 329
136196 What¡¯s the best birthday present you¡¯ve ever received? ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 365
136195 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 374
136194 WRITING TASK: What are the disadvantages of playing sports? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 6
136193 Homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 338
136192 How does sportswear affect performance? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 322
136191 Difficult decision which didn\'t work ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 445
136190 What can you say about your speaking skills when being... ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 406
136189 Describe a hobby that you are interested in ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 1
136188 Do you have a hard time saying \'no\'? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 2
136187 Page.39 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-08 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04