¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The best place to raise a family

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2024-03-18 1858

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think 'sweet home' is the best place to raise a family.
Because some children will don't come back to their home, and other children will feel happy living far from their family.
And some elder people will feel uncomfortable in their son or daughter's home.

I want to prescribe a 'sweet home' that family members feel 'comfortable' when they come back home.
I raised in this 'sweet home', so I was able to overcome the crisis of quitting my job.
Also my brother got healthy after he quitted his job and came back home.
He had lived alone because of his job. At that time, he got a hair loss and skin problem.

Therefore, the best place to rasie a family is a home where all family members feel comfortable when they're in home.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

You have written a meaningful answer, Min. ^^ I agree that the best place to raise a family is our "sweet home".
-Khai

I think 'sweet home' is the best place to raise a family.

>> I think ¡°sweet home¡± is the best place to raise a family.

Because some children will don't come back to their home, and other children will feel happy living far from their family.

>> It is because some children may not come back to their home, and other children will feel happy living far from their family.

And some elder people will feel uncomfortable in their son or daughter's home.

>> Some elderly people will also feel uncomfortable in their son or daughter's home.

I want to prescribe a 'sweet home' that family members feel 'comfortable' when they come back home.

>> I want to recommend a ¡°sweet home¡± where family members feel ¡°comfortable¡± when they come back home.

I raised in this 'sweet home', so I was able to overcome the crisis of quitting my job.

>> I was raised in this ¡°sweet home¡±, so I was able to overcome the crisis of quitting my job.

Also my brother got healthy after he quitted his job and came back home.

>> CORRECT

He had lived alone because of his job.

>> CORRECT

OR

>> Before, he lived alone because of his job.

At that time, he got a hair loss and skin problem.

>> CORRECT

OR

>> During that time, he had hair loss and skin problems.

Therefore, the best place to rasie a family is a home where all family members feel comfortable when they're in home.

>> Therefore, the best place to raise a family is a home where all family members feel comfortable when they're at home.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136334 Page.48 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-12 1
136333 April 17th\'s homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-12 1585
136332 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 2020
136331 Are video games good for you? Why? Á¤*Æò ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1508
136330 Which is better: experiencing a story through a movie or delving... Á¤*Æò ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1
136329 homwork À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1835
136328 1. Do you prefer Television or Books? State your opinion clearly... Á¤*Æò ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1573
136327 What is the best book you have read? Why? Á¤*Æò ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1
136326 Why do you think some Koreans do not like K-pop? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1
136325 I use the sentence words ½Å*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 2674
136324 What kind of person do you want to avoid? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 2014
136323 What\'s the most popular symbol you know? Explain your answer. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 2139
136322 Responding ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 2305
136321 homework 04.11 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1190
136320 Answer the questions  Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1792
136319 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 0
136318 How do you take care of your skin? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 2192
136317 Homework Á¶*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 2138
136316 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 1
136315 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-11 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04