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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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homework

작성자: 최*�
2024-03-13 702

회원님의 영작문

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of drinking energy drinks?

Energy drinks are popular among the sports drinks these days.
Most people who want drink energy drinks for exercise, work and study.
It's because they want to awaken the body's ability using caffeine.
So energy drinks's different name is high caffeine drink.
The energy drinks pros is awaken.
Using the awaken to keep our condition or don't get tired easily.
But, this kinds of drinks for awaken, has a big cons.
The first is our sleep patterns changed.
Usually, the caffeine's effect appear late night, so if I want fall asleep right away, but I'll feel insomnia.
Next cons is addiction caffeine.
Addicts easily feel tired and if they don't drink caffeine drinks they feel a headache.
It's unfortunate, but we can easily to find people who drinks coffee or somethings.
Even them, teenagers eat more caffeine drinks than adults.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of drinking energy drinks?

Energy drinks are popular among the sports drinks these days.
>> Energy drinks are popular sports drinks these days.
Most people who want drink energy drinks for exercise, work and study.
>> Most people drink energy drinks for exercise, work, and study.
It's because they want to awaken the body's ability using caffeine.
>> CORRECT!
So energy drinks's different name is high caffeine drink.
>> So, another name for energy drinks is high caffeine drinks.
The energy drinks pros is awaken.
>> The energy drinks' pros is to keep you awake.
Using the awaken to keep our condition or don't get tired easily.
>> Being awake and energized keep us in good condition, and don't get tired easily.
But, this kinds of drinks for awaken, has a big cons.
>> But, this kind of drinks has big cons.
The first is our sleep patterns changed.
>> First, it changes our sleeping patterns.
Usually, the caffeine's effect appear late night, so if I want fall asleep right away, but I'll feel insomnia.
>> Usually, the caffeine's effect appear late night, so if I want fall asleep right away, but I'll have insomnia.
Next cons is addiction caffeine.
>> Next cons is addiction to caffeine.
Addicts easily feel tired and if they don't drink caffeine drinks they feel a headache.
>> Addicts easily feel tired and if they don't drink caffeinated drinks, they have a headache.
It's unfortunate, but we can easily to find people who drinks coffee or somethings.
>> It's unfortunate, but we can easily find people who drink coffee or something else.
Even them, teenagers eat more caffeine drinks than adults.
>> Even them, teenagers drink more caffeinated drinks than adults.
OR >> Even them, teenagers consume more caffeinated drinks than adults.

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