¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK- What does it mean to put effort into all we do?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2024-03-13 1071

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

effort is very importent.
it will be hard much try, but i think results willl follow as well.
and it is fun as much as effort try.

so i try every day study english. i willl continue to study english even when i go to Australia

so, can i continue this lass if i go there?
if it impossible, i have so bad.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Well done, Eve!
Even though I made numerous corrections to your composition, I must say that you did an excellent job of honestly writing your output. Thank you for your effort, and I hope you'll continue to find time to write so you can take advantage of all the opportunities to improve your English. In addition, you can still study with us even when you move to Australia ^_^
Chammy
effort is very importent.
>>Effort is very important.
it will be hard much try, but i think results willl follow as well.
>> It will be too hard to try but I think good results will follow.
OR
>>>> It will be difficult to try, but I believe it will lead to positive outcomes.
and it is fun as much as effort try.
>> And it is fun the more effort we exert.
OR
>>And the more effort we put in, the more fun it is.
so i try every day study english. i willl continue to study english even when i go to Australia
>> So, I always try to study English every day. And I will try to continue studying English even when I go to Australia. 
OR
>>So, I make it a daily goal to study English. And even once I move to Australia, I'll make an effort to keep studying English.
so, can i continue this lass if i go there?
>> Can I continue this class if  I go there?
OR
>>If I go there, can I still continue this class?
if it impossible, i have so bad.
>> If it is impossible, I  will feel bad. 
OR
>>>> I'll be sorry if it's impossible.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132577 What benefits do you think meditation brings? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1
132576 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it important... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1
132575 Hardest working out ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 2536
132574 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132573 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132572 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132571 South Korea have diifferent accents! ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132570 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 2225
132569 diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132568 What is the most fun while studying ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1430
132567 Library ÀÌ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132566 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 2504
132565 The effect of ads ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 2627
132564 Similar character ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1765
132563 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1628
132562 homework ¾È*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 2979
132561 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1
132560 welfare ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 2520
132559 What do you prefer, to eat everything you like, drink a lot,... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 2408
132558 Q. Do you think Saudi Arabia¡¯s tactic of attracting players is... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04