¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.12

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-12 1219

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
If you have a big amount of money, what will you do about it?


I don't know well about other countries, but most Korean people usually want buy building and house if they have a big amount of money.
I'm also too If I have a lot of property, I wanna be a building owner.
It because, if we have a big money, we rarely spend a lot of money at once.
And case of buildings, it's usually a stable property.
Finally, most people don't want lose their money.
So, they will grow their wealth more.
On of the buzz words between Koreans say is "Building owner over the god."
The reason why that if you become a building owner on an expensive location, forever you don't need a job.
Really, some rich family even give their young children a building gift.
That's how many people want to be building owners.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
If you have a big amount of money, what will you do about it?



I don't know well about other countries, but most Korean people usually want buy building and house if they have a big amount of money.
>> I don't know well about other countries, but most Korean people usually want to buy buildings and houses if they have a big amount of money.
I'm also too If I have a lot of property, I wanna be a building owner.
>> If I also have a lot of property, I wanna be a building owner.
OR >> If I also have many properties, I wanna be a building owner.
It because, if we have a big money, we rarely spend a lot of money at once.
>> It's because, if we have a big amount of money, we rarely spend a lot of money at once.
And case of buildings, it's usually a stable property.
>> In case of buildings, it's usually a stable property.
Finally, most people don't want lose their money.
>> CORRECT!
So, they will grow their wealth more.
>> CORRECT!
On of the buzz words between Koreans say is "Building owner over the god."
>> One of the buzz words among Koreans, they say "Building owners are over the god."
The reason why that if you become a building owner on an expensive location, forever you don't need a job.
>> The reason is that if you become a building owner in an expensive location, you don't need a job at all.
Really, some rich family even give their young children a building gift.
>> Really, some rich families even give their young children a building as a gift.
That's how many people want to be building owners.
>> That's why many people want to be building owners.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134344 When is a family member considered to be a \"black sheep\"? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1544
134343 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1617
134342 ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1809
134341 Homework ÇÏ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 0
134340 Which do you prefer, watching TV or reading books? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1283
134339 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 880
134338 Annoying others ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 1296
134337 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 2
134336 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 0
134335 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 0
134334 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 1583
134333 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 0
134332 homework 01.30 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 1415
134331 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 1170
134330 Why need education ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 0
134329 What makes you lazy? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 1050
134328 Are there any special events that take place in summer in your... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 0
134327 Think about your last trip. Write about what you learned, what... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 2
134326 I wished.. ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 1154
134325 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-30 1214

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04