¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.12

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-12 614

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
If you have a big amount of money, what will you do about it?


I don't know well about other countries, but most Korean people usually want buy building and house if they have a big amount of money.
I'm also too If I have a lot of property, I wanna be a building owner.
It because, if we have a big money, we rarely spend a lot of money at once.
And case of buildings, it's usually a stable property.
Finally, most people don't want lose their money.
So, they will grow their wealth more.
On of the buzz words between Koreans say is "Building owner over the god."
The reason why that if you become a building owner on an expensive location, forever you don't need a job.
Really, some rich family even give their young children a building gift.
That's how many people want to be building owners.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
If you have a big amount of money, what will you do about it?



I don't know well about other countries, but most Korean people usually want buy building and house if they have a big amount of money.
>> I don't know well about other countries, but most Korean people usually want to buy buildings and houses if they have a big amount of money.
I'm also too If I have a lot of property, I wanna be a building owner.
>> If I also have a lot of property, I wanna be a building owner.
OR >> If I also have many properties, I wanna be a building owner.
It because, if we have a big money, we rarely spend a lot of money at once.
>> It's because, if we have a big amount of money, we rarely spend a lot of money at once.
And case of buildings, it's usually a stable property.
>> In case of buildings, it's usually a stable property.
Finally, most people don't want lose their money.
>> CORRECT!
So, they will grow their wealth more.
>> CORRECT!
On of the buzz words between Koreans say is "Building owner over the god."
>> One of the buzz words among Koreans, they say "Building owners are over the god."
The reason why that if you become a building owner on an expensive location, forever you don't need a job.
>> The reason is that if you become a building owner in an expensive location, you don't need a job at all.
Really, some rich family even give their young children a building gift.
>> Really, some rich families even give their young children a building as a gift.
That's how many people want to be building owners.
>> That's why many people want to be building owners.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137964 Traffic rules ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 1284
137963 Do you enjoy meeting new people? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 505
137962 How do you reject something in a polite way? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 437
137961 Why do you think parasailing is exciting? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 588
137960 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 552
137959 Fix the relationship with my friend ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 586
137958 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 666
137957 What kind of people do you like to meet? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 637
137956 Why is it simpler to be nervous than confident in most... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 443
137955 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 0
137954 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 7
137953 Can sadness be useful in people¡¯s lives? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 2
137952 TV ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 584
137951 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 559
137950 Bad habits ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 677
137949 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 1
137948 Does talking about a sad experience help make the person feel... ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 2
137947 homework 11 ¼Û*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 640
137946 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 1
137945 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04