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My Three Thing To Achieve

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*À²
2024-03-11 1111

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First, I want to make friends with all my classmates this year.
Because I can play fun if I have a lot of friends and I won't worry when I am in 3rd grades.
Second, I will got 95 scores in my first test. It is very important for my future high school. So I will study very hard and got 95 scores.
Third, I will take care of myself. I should eat lots of water and sleep more than now.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Julie! Well done on accomplishing your homework! These changes aim to make the text clearer, more grammatically correct, and smoother to read.


First, I want to make friends with all my classmates this year.
>>> First, I want to make friends with all my classmates this year 
Because I can play fun if I have a lot of friends and I won't worry when I am in 3rd grades.
>>> because having many friends means I can have more fun, and I won't worry when I am in 3rd grade.
Second, I will got 95 scores in my first test. 
>>> Second, I will aim to score 95 on my first test. 
It is very important for my future high school. 
>>> It is very important for my future high school. 
So I will study very hard and got 95 scores.
>>> Therefore, I will study very hard to achieve this score.
Third, I will take care of myself. 
>>> Third, I will take better care of myself. 
I should eat lots of water and sleep more than now.
>>> I should drink plenty of water and get more sleep than I do now.
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