¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My opinion that governments should encourage pubilc trasportation

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2024-03-10 1897

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that the local governments of noncapital area should encouage public transportation more.
The local governments in Korea face to a decrease of population.
I think traffic inconvenience is one of the reason why local population has decreased.
One of my coworker said that the reason she decided to come back her hometown is the traffic inconvenience.

Also lack of public trasportation is related to global climate crisis.
In my city, many workers commute to their office by driving cars.
It is so critical to earth because many cars use fossil fuel.

Therefore I think the local governments should make a plan to encourage people to use public trasportation.
For example, many gorvernment officers in my city live in a new town and the city hall is located in old downtown.
So we need to increase the bus routes from new town to the city hall during rush hour.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

This is a meaningful essay, Min. ^^ I am glad that you were able to give valuable reasons on why the government should encourage people to use public transportation more.
-Khai 

I think that the local governments of noncapital area should encouage public transportation more.

>> I think that the local governments of noncapital areas should encourage public transportation more.

The local governments in Korea face to a decrease of population.

>> The local governments in Korea face a decrease in population.

I think traffic inconvenience is one of the reason why local population has decreased.

>> I think traffic inconvenience is one of the reasons why the local population has decreased.

One of my coworker said that the reason she decided to come back her hometown is the traffic inconvenience.

>> One of my coworkers said that the reason she decided to come back to her hometown is the traffic inconvenience.

Also lack of public trasportation is related to global climate crisis.

>> Also, the lack of public transportation is related to the global climate crisis.

In my city, many workers commute to their office by driving cars.

>> CORRECT

It is so critical to earth because many cars use fossil fuel.

>> CORRECT

OR

>> This causes pollution because many cars use fossil fuel.

Therefore I think the local governments should make a plan to encourage people to use public trasportation.

>> Therefore I think the local governments should make a plan to encourage people to use public transportation.

For example, many gorvernment officers in my city live in a new town and the city hall is located in old downtown.

>> For example, many government officers in my city live in a new town and the city hall is located in the old downtown.

So we need to increase the bus routes from new town to the city hall during rush hour.

>> So we need to increase the bus routes from the new town to the city hall during rush hour.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131808 Why do you think people are afraid of ghosts even if they... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 1710
131807 CHOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°What is the... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 0
131806 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 0
131805 arts or public services Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 3
131804 Have you watched any sports live at a sports ground or stadium?... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 2307
131803 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 0
131802 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 2169
131801 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 1
131800 Buying some things for my family and friends ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 1956
131799 homework_231019 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 2942
131798 Home work ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 1991
131797 Home work ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 1759
131796 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 1397
131795 army ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 1796
131794 Do you like eating out at famous restaurants where there are... ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 2014
131793 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 2100
131792 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 2003
131791 How can we help the older generation relate to the younger... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 0
131790 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 0
131789 Describe the world 100 years from now. Describe how people live,... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-20 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04