¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My opinion that governments should encourage pubilc trasportation

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2024-03-10 758

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that the local governments of noncapital area should encouage public transportation more.
The local governments in Korea face to a decrease of population.
I think traffic inconvenience is one of the reason why local population has decreased.
One of my coworker said that the reason she decided to come back her hometown is the traffic inconvenience.

Also lack of public trasportation is related to global climate crisis.
In my city, many workers commute to their office by driving cars.
It is so critical to earth because many cars use fossil fuel.

Therefore I think the local governments should make a plan to encourage people to use public trasportation.
For example, many gorvernment officers in my city live in a new town and the city hall is located in old downtown.
So we need to increase the bus routes from new town to the city hall during rush hour.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

This is a meaningful essay, Min. ^^ I am glad that you were able to give valuable reasons on why the government should encourage people to use public transportation more.
-Khai 

I think that the local governments of noncapital area should encouage public transportation more.

>> I think that the local governments of noncapital areas should encourage public transportation more.

The local governments in Korea face to a decrease of population.

>> The local governments in Korea face a decrease in population.

I think traffic inconvenience is one of the reason why local population has decreased.

>> I think traffic inconvenience is one of the reasons why the local population has decreased.

One of my coworker said that the reason she decided to come back her hometown is the traffic inconvenience.

>> One of my coworkers said that the reason she decided to come back to her hometown is the traffic inconvenience.

Also lack of public trasportation is related to global climate crisis.

>> Also, the lack of public transportation is related to the global climate crisis.

In my city, many workers commute to their office by driving cars.

>> CORRECT

It is so critical to earth because many cars use fossil fuel.

>> CORRECT

OR

>> This causes pollution because many cars use fossil fuel.

Therefore I think the local governments should make a plan to encourage people to use public trasportation.

>> Therefore I think the local governments should make a plan to encourage people to use public transportation.

For example, many gorvernment officers in my city live in a new town and the city hall is located in old downtown.

>> For example, many government officers in my city live in a new town and the city hall is located in the old downtown.

So we need to increase the bus routes from new town to the city hall during rush hour.

>> So we need to increase the bus routes from the new town to the city hall during rush hour.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133970 What activity can you do when it is raining? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 304
133969 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 325
133968 Homework ±è*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 531
133967 Make up makes people beautiful ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 313
133966 It is normal to feel nervous, but how can you overcome it? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 885
133965 What kind of appetizer and dessert do you like ordering in... ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 342
133964 What do you expect on your next date? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 3
133963 I love you..., teacher ;) À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 603
133962 Do you always recycle your old clothes or give them to charity? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 323
133961 My attitude. Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 531
133960 I think it\'s difficult to increase productivity. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 265
133959 What test has made you most nervous? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 323
133958 My course menu ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 198
133957 WRITING TASK: Which party haven\'t you attended yet? Would you... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 10
133956 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 292
133955 What¡¯s new with you? ÃÖ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 2
133954 Filling in Blanks ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 280
133953 Homework : unit 1 ¹Ú*³ª ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 1
133952 essay 6 ¼Û*½Â ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 618
133951 essay 6 ¼Û*½Â ¿Ï·á 2024-01-17 480

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04