¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Beauty

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÓ*Áø
2024-03-07 1062

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

We often say that since genuine beauty is in ourselves, we should refrain from evaluating person by mere appearance.
However, this sentence is just ideal story, the impact of appearance is actually enormous in South Korea.
In fact, Korea is famous for plastic surgery and idol culture in all over the world.
Thus, most people have inner needs to be the typical good-looking person.
Korean tends to be conscious of other's eyes and have strict standards about the beautiful appearance.
In these reasons, when I go out of my country, I naturally travel without makeup and uncomfortable clothes.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey there, Ms. Yu Jin! Thank you for sharing your perspective on the impact of appearance in South Korea. It's interesting to hear about the cultural influence of plastic surgery and the emphasis on beauty standards. 
~T. Jenna

We often say that since genuine beauty is in ourselves, we should refrain from evaluating person by mere appearance.
>>We often say that since genuine beauty is in ourselves, we should refrain from evaluating a person by mere appearance.
OR
>>We often hear that real beauty comes from who we are on the inside, so it's better not to judge people just by how they look.
However, this sentence is just ideal story, the impact of appearance is actually enormous in South Korea.
>>However, this sentence is just an ideal story; the impact of appearance is actually enormous in South Korea.
OR
>>While this statement paints an ideal picture, the reality in South Korea reveals a significant influence of appearance.
In fact, Korea is famous for plastic surgery and idol culture in all over the world.
>>In fact, Korea is famous for plastic surgery and idol culture all over the world.
OR
>> In fact, Korea is globally renowned for its widespread popularity in plastic surgery and idol culture.
Thus, most people have inner needs to be the typical good-looking person.
>> Thus, most people have an inner desire to be the typical good-looking person.
Korean tends to be conscious of other's eyes and have strict standards about the beautiful appearance.
>>Koreans tend to be conscious of other's eyes and have strict standards about the beautiful appearance.
OR
>>Koreans tend to be conscious of others' eyes and adhere to strict standards of beauty.
In these reasons, when I go out of my country, I naturally travel without makeup and uncomfortable clothes.
>>For these reasons, when I go out of my country, I naturally travel without makeup and uncomfortable clothes.
OR
>>Given these reasons, when I travel outside my country, I instinctively choose to go without makeup and opt for comfortable clothing.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134474 WRITING TASK: How do you maintain an interesting conversation? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 4
134473 homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 2
134472 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1616
134471 Good traditions °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1199
134470 What should you bring for a trip? ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1173
134469 Would you rather die in 20 years with no regrets or live to 100... ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1304
134468 How would you introduce your country to foreigners? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1284
134467 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1792
134466 Do you have a favorate room in your home ? which room do you... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1392
134465 Will you die without regrets in 20 years or will you live to the... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1090
134464 Would you rather be stuck on an island alone or with someone who... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1218
134463 Would you rather be the loudest or quietest person in the room? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1236
134462 Would you rather have the ability to be invisible or to read... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 789
134461 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1
134460 What kind of place do you live in now ?, How long have you been... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1170
134459 homework 2024-02-05 ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1
134458 homework4 ÇÑ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 1247
134457 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 0
134456 My speaking skill ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 2141
134455 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-05 998

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04