무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Beauty

작성자: 임*진
2024-03-07 1048

회원님의 영작문

We often say that since genuine beauty is in ourselves, we should refrain from evaluating person by mere appearance.
However, this sentence is just ideal story, the impact of appearance is actually enormous in South Korea.
In fact, Korea is famous for plastic surgery and idol culture in all over the world.
Thus, most people have inner needs to be the typical good-looking person.
Korean tends to be conscious of other's eyes and have strict standards about the beautiful appearance.
In these reasons, when I go out of my country, I naturally travel without makeup and uncomfortable clothes.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hey there, Ms. Yu Jin! Thank you for sharing your perspective on the impact of appearance in South Korea. It's interesting to hear about the cultural influence of plastic surgery and the emphasis on beauty standards. 
~T. Jenna

We often say that since genuine beauty is in ourselves, we should refrain from evaluating person by mere appearance.
>>We often say that since genuine beauty is in ourselves, we should refrain from evaluating a person by mere appearance.
OR
>>We often hear that real beauty comes from who we are on the inside, so it's better not to judge people just by how they look.
However, this sentence is just ideal story, the impact of appearance is actually enormous in South Korea.
>>However, this sentence is just an ideal story; the impact of appearance is actually enormous in South Korea.
OR
>>While this statement paints an ideal picture, the reality in South Korea reveals a significant influence of appearance.
In fact, Korea is famous for plastic surgery and idol culture in all over the world.
>>In fact, Korea is famous for plastic surgery and idol culture all over the world.
OR
>> In fact, Korea is globally renowned for its widespread popularity in plastic surgery and idol culture.
Thus, most people have inner needs to be the typical good-looking person.
>> Thus, most people have an inner desire to be the typical good-looking person.
Korean tends to be conscious of other's eyes and have strict standards about the beautiful appearance.
>>Koreans tend to be conscious of other's eyes and have strict standards about the beautiful appearance.
OR
>>Koreans tend to be conscious of others' eyes and adhere to strict standards of beauty.
In these reasons, when I go out of my country, I naturally travel without makeup and uncomfortable clothes.
>>For these reasons, when I go out of my country, I naturally travel without makeup and uncomfortable clothes.
OR
>>Given these reasons, when I travel outside my country, I instinctively choose to go without makeup and opt for comfortable clothing.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
134732 Is it proper to euthanize patients who have \"Sleeping Beauty... 황*은 완료 2024-02-16 1399
134731 Homework do*eun 완료 2024-02-16 730
134730 Which one do you think is more difficult, lose your sight or... 임*호 완료 2024-02-16 0
134729 What do you think is the worst social problem? 신*섭 완료 2024-02-16 919
134728 What are the effects of loving to read? 임*호 완료 2024-02-16 2
134727 Some people think video games are a waste of time. What do you... 임*호 완료 2024-02-16 0
134726 What Korean tradition do you like most? 임*호 완료 2024-02-16 0
134725 WRITING TASK: What do you enjoy eating with your friends? 임*지 완료 2024-02-16 3
134724 Catch up the fashion 임*진 완료 2024-02-16 752
134723 Advise 염*예 완료 2024-02-16 1
134722 Giving a hand 염*예 완료 2024-02-16 1
134721 Have you ever helped a friend when they really needed help ?... 박*호 완료 2024-02-16 837
134720 Hiring part-time instructors 양*연 완료 2024-02-16 1315
134719 what do you think of leaves 김*옥 완료 2024-02-15 1154
134718 homework 02.15 최*� 완료 2024-02-15 625
134717 Suggestions on my life 이*규 완료 2024-02-15 839
134716 Choose holidays 박*율 완료 2024-02-15 1122
134715 homework 김*현 완료 2024-02-15 1121
134714 My best about holidays 김*아 완료 2024-02-15 1762
134713 If you could spend a day with any fictional character, who would... 최*훈 완료 2024-02-15 894

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]