¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2024-03-06 1836

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi, T.Donna.
I could spend all of my time to be happy today.
Everything was perfect.
I woke up with a good emotion.
After the class, I rode a car to take my kids to their school; their vacation was finished.
And then, my wife and I went to a cinema and watched a movie "Digging the grave".
In my opinion, it was not such a good movie because there were only little probability and I saw many awkward transition all over the movie, nevertheless, we were satisfied somewhat.
That's because we could spend our time without kids after a long time.
Our lunch also was satisfying.
After lunch, we went to the school to take our kids to home.
I could meet a friend of Irene, it was meaningful, I guess.
In the guitar class, the teacher praised me about improvement and diligence.
My family and I ate a grilled pork for dinner, and it tasted really good.
After dinner, my kids and my wife played Nintendo game.
I felt large amount of happiness while watching them.
MJ didn't bother me as I expected.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Kim!

By this time, your life had stabilized. Everything is running smoothly and peacefully. It is true that life is full of adversities and stress however, it is also a choice to be happy and contented. In short, the toxicity level that we allow in our lives is the decision we make all the time.

Anyway, I learned much about the movie 'Digging the Grave' from you today. Since we grew up watching excellent quality movie plots, it is easy to spot a good movie from the average ones. Thank you for sharing the synopsis as well as your critical review of the logical flow of the story.

I wish you more days as yesterday and even happier ones! Since you quit dealing with negativity, your life has now more rooms for positive energies and connections. Whatever lies ahead including success in your clinic, you truly deserve it.

Please study the underlined grammar suggestions and make sure to incorporate them on your next compositions. Well done!

See you!

-T. Donna~

Hi, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

I could spend all of my time to be happy today.
>> Correct!

Everything was perfect.
>> Correct!

I woke up with a good emotion.
>> Correct!

After the class, I rode a car to take my kids to their school; their vacation was finished.
>> Correct! 

And then, my wife and I went to a cinema and watched a movie "Digging the grave".
>> Correct
Or: "Digging the Grave"

In my opinion, it was not such a good movie because there were only little probability and I saw many awkward transition all over the movie, nevertheless, we were satisfied somewhat.
>> In my opinion, it was not such a good movie because there were only a little probability and I saw many awkward transitions all over the movie, nevertheless, we were satisfied somewhat. Very good sentence!

That's because we could spend our time without kids after a long time.
>> That's because we could spend our time without  the kids after a long time.

Our lunch also was satisfying.
>> Correct!
Or:  Our lunch was also satisfying.

After lunch, we went to the school to take our kids to home.
>>After lunch, we went to the school to take our kids home.

I could meet a friend of Irene, it was meaningful, I guess.
>> Correct!
Or: I met a friend of Irene and I guess it was meaningful.

In the guitar class, the teacher praised me about improvement and diligence.
>> In the guitar class, the teacher praised me for my improvement and diligence.

My family and I ate a grilled pork for dinner, and it tasted really good.
>> My family and I ate grilled pork for dinner, and it tasted really good.

After dinner, my kids and my wife played Nintendo game.
>> After dinner, my kids and my wife played a Nintendo game.

I felt large amount of happiness while watching them.
>> I felt a huge amount of happiness while watching them.

MJ didn't bother me as I expected.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128611 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-02 2083
128610 What do you think is the most dangerous sport? ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-02 1331
128609 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-02 1
128608 Fantastic Jeju island ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-02 1345
128607 Physical communication or verbal communication: which is... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-06-02 1
128606 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-06-02 2
128605 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1580
128604 Thinking of house ÃÖ*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1
128603 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1549
128602 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 0
128601 homework 06.01 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1527
128600 Home work Á¶* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1733
128599 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 0
128598 What is the most time-consuming thing you do in your life? ¹Ú*³ª ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1446
128597 home wark ÀÌ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1609
128596 What\'s the worst experience you\'ve had in your hometown? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1708
128595 How are people enslaved because they owe a debt to someone else? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 4
128594 My favorite color ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1557
128593 Homework ¾È*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1772
128592 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-01 1441

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04